-
New Humanities Core Sequence for STEM Majors Will Teach Punctuation
“I have good words! Humanities bad!” protested Pat Greeneberg, a Bio major.
-
Orthodox and Catholic Churches Reunite, Citing “Reconcilable Differences”
“We’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately, and we’ve come to the realization that papal infallibility and unwavering submission to Rome are actually really cool.”
-
International House Students Steal Thousands of Maroon Dollars from University Dining
Our sources have already received rumors of an underground Maroon Dollar trading poker ring operating under the Regenstein Library…
-
UChicago Course Catalog Includes New Devil’s Advocate Class
Typical texts include some combination of Shapiro, Davis, Reich, and Owens."
-
Op-Ed: I Just Completed This Century’s Mona Lisa in the 1st Floor Harper Women’s Bathrooms
Years from now, art history students will take treks to the 1st Floor Harper Women’s Bathrooms to study my seminal painting.
-
Kevin McCarthy Secures College Council Speakership After 14 Ballots
I really just wanted to put ‘Speaker of College Council’ on my LinkedIn.
-
Why Unions Are Bad Actually (Not Sponsored by University of Chicago)
Unions are the only group which can negotiate for you: if you’re represented by a union, you’ll only have negotiating power as a collective rather than a super cool, maverick, lone wolf individual…
-
Top Twenty Things on Other People’s Laptops You Can Pay Attention to Instead of Your Bio Topics Lecture
Youtube fan edit for the 90s classic Y Tu Mama Tambien.
-
Top Ten Most Romantic Days in February
My uncle Fred’s birthday is February 6.
-
Heartbreaking! DU Invested Entire Fund Into FTX
Reports show DU members begging for Maroon Dollars outside the Reg to repay their debt, although no member responded to our request for comment.
