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The Halftime Show Was Good, But Where Was Jason Mraz?
The halftime show was great. Don’t get me wrong. Amazing rappers I’ve loved my whole life, not to mention with the incomparable Mary J. Blige, teaming up for a performance I couldn’t dream…
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Imagine if we matched on datamatch haha jk unless?
So like, wouldn’t it be like totally crazy 💫😜 if we matched on datamatch 😂😂? Like that would be sooooo weird since we’re such good friends 💙👫 haha 😜😂. Like obviously we’d never…
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3 Sex Poems from My Poetry Workshop That Scream “I’m a Virgin”
When I signed up for this poetry workshop, I had no idea that the people in it would be so horny — or so repressed. Somehow, every single poem submitted has been explicitly…
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New Study Finds That Only 25% of Your Friends Like You
A recent study published in the Chicago Review of Sociology found that only a small fraction of your friends actually like you, with barely a fourth of your close contacts and loved ones…
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A Dealer Investigation: The “Bar” in Bar Night is Referencing the Bar Exam, Right?
Like generational wealth or seasonal depression, Alpha Delt’s Bar Night is a long-held tradition at the University of Chicago. Most students are familiar with classic bar night practices like getting drunk and attempting…
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Race in America: My Experience as a White Student Undercover as a Black Student Undercover as a White Student
I have done many things for the sake of journalism. I’ve gone deep undercover as a UChicago cafeteria worker, delved into the financial workings of our school’s administration, and even kayaked on the…
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How to Look Hot on a Divvy Bike
Divvy bikes are convenient – if you happen to find one that works. But sadly, some students irationally fear they’ll look “stupid” on one. We hope to remove the stigma around these blue…
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New Year’s Editorial
Covid is no laughing matter, which is why we haven’t been funny this past year. In every article, pitch, or tweet we wrote, we intentionally strove to remove all traces of humor —…
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College Announces Precautionary Dorm Relocation to New Zealand
UChicago’s Department of Housing and Residence Life announced very late Thursday evening that housing for all undergraduates would be relocated to the suburbs of Wellington, New Zealand, beginning January 2022. The statement was…
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Dealer Exclusive: An Interview with Paul Alivisatos
The Dealer sat down for an exclusive interview with newly-inaugurated President Paul Alivisatos. In doing so, the Dealer has become the only student publication to gain access to the elusive campus giant. (The…
