• MEETING INFO: Thursdays, 6 pm, Harper 145.
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Editors in Chief

Nik Ochoa, Chase Teichholz

Managing Editor

Antonia Romm

Deputy Managing Editor

Katherine Timm

Layout Editor

Shayaan Gandhi

Photo Editor

Maddy Boneck

Copy Editor

Matilda Robinson

Disclaimer

Did we hurt your feelings, or say something that “rings untrue” in your soft ears? Well you’re paying too much attention to what we said, and not enough attention to what we meant.

Any complaints can be emailed to [email protected].

Chicago Shady Dealer, Favorites

UChicago Student Running From College Council

While the beginning of Spring Quarter has marked numerous announcements of ambitious students running for College Council, one student has decided to rival this long-standing tradition by running from College Council. Simon Jorgensen, a second year…

read more
April 19, 2021
Campus Life, Favorites

Kid Makes Anaphylactic Shock All About Himself

Joseph Silverstein, a member of Johnson’s house, said, “Yeah, so while John went to the bathroom, I swapped his muffin with one that had peanuts, and, gosh, after hearing that…

read more
January 5, 2023
Chicago Shady Dealer, Favorites

Visiting Parents Worried about the Cost of Three Weddings after Seeing Son Talk to Three Different Girls in His House

While parents Michael and Jessica Trout carefully budgeted for their son Timothy’s college expenses along with a single wedding, they were abruptly reminded that some costs simply cannot be anticipated…

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October 24, 2021
Campus Life, Favorites

University Introduces New Way to Get Downtown: “Walk, Motherfuckers”

This option has been poorly received by undergraduates, as several would-be ‘motherfuckers’ told the Dealer.

read more
December 6, 2022
Campus Life, Favorites

Math Department Discovers New Highest Number

A team of mathematicians at the University of Chicago have discovered a new highest number, a new paper reveals. That number, 87382, is nearly 2 higher than the previous highest…

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November 16, 2020
  • Campus Life

    Chat-GPT Goes on Strike, Cites Poor Working Conditions

    Jacob Halabe / October 10, 2023
    read more
  • Punch Bowl with Nuclear Symbol.
    Campus Life,  Chicago Shady Dealer

    Radium Punch at Glow Party Causes Controversy

    Maisie Thompson / October 8, 2023
    read more
  • Politics

    France and Peru to Trade Places for a Week

    Griffin Bonnin Jones / May 22, 2023
    read more
  • Arts & Culture

    Op-Ed: Heartbreaking! Phoebe Bridgers Broke up With Her Boyfriend, Also on a Separate Note, My Parents’ House Is Being Foreclosed on and We Don’t Have a Home

    Andre Dang / May 19, 2023
    read more
  • Politics

    Op-Ed: Journalism Means Never Having to Say You’re Sorry

    Bret Stephens / May 17, 2023
    read more
  • Campus Life

    Copy of USG Announces Plan to Recount All Five Votes

    Chicago Shady Dealer Newsdesk / May 17, 2023
    read more
  • Politics

    Model UN Becomes Too Powerful; Overthrows Real UN

    Vivian Psylos / May 16, 2023
    read more
  • Campus Life

    Econ Major Declares for NBA Draft, Cites Fact that Most Draftees Make Millions

    William Foster / May 16, 2023
    read more
  • Campus Life

    Breaking: Class Day Speaker Bret Stephens Discovered to Be 7 Billion Bedbugs in a Suit

    Hermosillo Sardinia / May 13, 2023
    read more
  • Campus Life

    A Guide to Emotionally Preparing for Canvas Notifications

    Justin Bilenker / May 12, 2023
    read more
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