• MEETING INFO: Thursdays, 6 pm, Harper 145.
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Editors in Chief

Nik Ochoa, Chase Teichholz

Managing Editor

Antonia Romm

Deputy Managing Editor

Katherine Timm

Layout Editor

Shayaan Gandhi

Photo Editor

Maddy Boneck

Copy Editor

Matilda Robinson

Disclaimer

Did we hurt your feelings, or say something that “rings untrue” in your soft ears? Well you’re paying too much attention to what we said, and not enough attention to what we meant.

Any complaints can be emailed to [email protected].

Campus Life, Favorites

Math Department Discovers New Highest Number

A team of mathematicians at the University of Chicago have discovered a new highest number, a new paper reveals. That number, 87382, is nearly 2 higher than the previous highest…

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November 16, 2020
Chicago Shady Dealer, Favorites

UChicago Student Running From College Council

While the beginning of Spring Quarter has marked numerous announcements of ambitious students running for College Council, one student has decided to rival this long-standing tradition by running from College Council. Simon Jorgensen, a second year…

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April 19, 2021
Chicago Shady Dealer, Favorites

OI Renamed “Indiana H. Jones Institute of Academic Grave-Robbing”

In an effort to promote diversity, the Institute will showcase numerous artifacts looted and pillaged from cultures around the world.

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November 30, 2022
Campus Life, Favorites

University Introduces New Way to Get Downtown: “Walk, Motherfuckers”

This option has been poorly received by undergraduates, as several would-be ‘motherfuckers’ told the Dealer.

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December 6, 2022
Campus Life, Favorites

Kid Makes Anaphylactic Shock All About Himself

Joseph Silverstein, a member of Johnson’s house, said, “Yeah, so while John went to the bathroom, I swapped his muffin with one that had peanuts, and, gosh, after hearing that…

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January 5, 2023
  • Chicago Shady Dealer

    “Practicals” and Other Words to Say at Your House Table So People Know You’re Cool

    Lena Birkholz / October 15, 2024
    read more
  • Campus Life

    First-Year’s Roommate Bears Suspiciously Striking Resemblance to D.B. Cooper

    Griffin Bonnin Jones / October 14, 2024
    read more
  • Campus Life

    Extra! Extra! Fresh RSO Ads Here!

    Andrea Zhou / October 13, 2024
    read more
  • Campus Life

    REPORT: Botany Pond Reopens (Just Kidding)

    Maisie Thompson / October 12, 2024
    read more
  • Campus Life

    Glow Party Ruined by Ring of People Exchanging SAT Scores

    Chicago Shady Dealer Newsdesk / October 11, 2024
    read more
  • Campus Life

    Stunning: O-Week Friend Group Forms Bond That Will Last a Whole Two Weeks

    Chicago Shady Dealer Newsdesk / October 11, 2024
    read more
  • Chicago Shady Dealer

    UChicago Announces Plans To Replace Campus Shuttles With Piggyback Rides

    Jacob Halabe / October 9, 2024
    read more
  • Chicago Shady Dealer

    Report: 2024-25 Not Your Year Either

    Griffin Bonnin Jones / October 8, 2024
    read more
  • Campus Life

    Third Year Frat Brother Says He Majors in Bizcon “For the Children”

    Chicago Shady Dealer / October 7, 2024
    read more
  • Campus Life

    Precocious First-Year Starts College with Opps Pre-Established

    Lena Birkholz / October 7, 2024
    read more
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