• MEETING INFO: Thursdays, 6 pm, Harper 145.
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Editors in Chief

Nik Ochoa, Chase Teichholz

Managing Editor

Antonia Romm

Deputy Managing Editor

Katherine Timm

Layout Editor

Shayaan Gandhi

Photo Editor

Maddy Boneck

Copy Editor

Matilda Robinson

Disclaimer

Did we hurt your feelings, or say something that “rings untrue” in your soft ears? Well you’re paying too much attention to what we said, and not enough attention to what we meant.

Any complaints can be emailed to [email protected].

Chicago Shady Dealer, Favorites

UChicago Student Running From College Council

While the beginning of Spring Quarter has marked numerous announcements of ambitious students running for College Council, one student has decided to rival this long-standing tradition by running from College Council. Simon Jorgensen, a second year…

read more
April 19, 2021
Chicago Shady Dealer, Favorites

Visiting Parents Worried about the Cost of Three Weddings after Seeing Son Talk to Three Different Girls in His House

While parents Michael and Jessica Trout carefully budgeted for their son Timothy’s college expenses along with a single wedding, they were abruptly reminded that some costs simply cannot be anticipated…

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October 24, 2021
Chicago Shady Dealer, Favorites

OI Renamed “Indiana H. Jones Institute of Academic Grave-Robbing”

In an effort to promote diversity, the Institute will showcase numerous artifacts looted and pillaged from cultures around the world.

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November 30, 2022
Campus Life, Favorites

University Introduces New Way to Get Downtown: “Walk, Motherfuckers”

This option has been poorly received by undergraduates, as several would-be ‘motherfuckers’ told the Dealer.

read more
December 6, 2022
Campus Life, Favorites

Math Department Discovers New Highest Number

A team of mathematicians at the University of Chicago have discovered a new highest number, a new paper reveals. That number, 87382, is nearly 2 higher than the previous highest…

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November 16, 2020
  • Chicago Shady Dealer

    UChicago’s Most Eligible Bachelor Found to be “Escaped Specimen” From UChicago Medicine

    Maisie Thompson and 1 more / December 7, 2023
    read more
  • Campus Life

    House Misses Apple Season, Forced to Go Rutabaga Picking

    Lena Birkholz and 1 more / December 6, 2023
    read more
  • Campus Life

    UChicago Login Systems Switch From Duo to Trio

    Alasdair Greenland / December 6, 2023
    read more
  • Campus Life

    First-Year Enchanted by Dead Gazes of Grad Students in Lab

    Katherine Reynolds / December 6, 2023
    read more
  • World Affairs

    World Leaders Pledge to Kill Last Black Rhino by 2030

    Griffin Bonnin Jones / December 5, 2023
    read more
  • World Affairs

    Helium Balloons Rise Due to Inflation

    Justin Bilenker / December 5, 2023
    read more
  • Arts & Culture

    Study Finds Bite Magazine Not Edible

    Maisie Thompson and 1 more / December 4, 2023
    read more
  • Campus Life

    Student Wellness Reports 700% Increase in Gout

    Griffin Bonnin Jones / December 4, 2023
    read more
  • Chicago Shady Dealer,  Off-Campus Life

    EPIC NEW FRESHMEN CHARTER NEW FRAT OMEGA OMEGA OMEGA

    Albek Jones / December 3, 2023
    read more
  • Shorthand.
    Scientific Excellence

    Chemistry Department Adds Shorthand Requirement to Make Time for Even Longer Pre-labs

    Lydia Osborn / November 17, 2023
    read more
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