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Five Ass Tattoos You Won’t Regret
By Breck Radulovic April 23, 2016 1. An Outline of a Hheart- Turn your own ass into a dry-erase board of love!. Ask your lover to write in their initials with sharpie, and…
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Canadians Glad Justin Trudeau Distracts from their Small Population and Cold Climate
By Nico Aldape April 23, 2016 Though he has been in office for over five months now, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau continues to make waves through his embrace of social change and…
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Inspiring: This Major League Baseball Player Uses Drugs That Make Him Play Worse
By Daniel Ruttenberg April 23, 2016 When I was a kid, I used to love baseball. Yessir, my ideal Friday was not ‘nt playing board games or running outside, it wasbut watching a…
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New Off-Ocean Program Brings Whales to UChicago
By Jacob Johnson April 23, 2016 DueAnnouncing to a new shared initiative between the SHAMU (Society for Humans Meeting Animal Undergraduates) University of Chicago and the Marine Biological Lab in Woods Hole Massachusetts,Saint…
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Sexual Experimentation Fails Peer Review
By Morgan Pantuck and Reed Thurston April 23, 2016 A controversial study submitted to the New England Journal of Medicine was officially rejected for publication this past weekend following peer review. “Butt Stuff:…
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The Wiggles Pull Music from Spotify in Show of Solidarity with Taylor Swift
By Jacob Levin April 23, 2016 In a public announcement Monday, The Wiggles announced that they have decided to remove all of their music from Spotify to show solidarity with Taylor Swift and…
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Student Bouncing Leg Up and Down Shows No Sign of Stopping
By Nik Varley April 23, 2016 SourcesStudents in Professor Pierce Jackson’s SOSC 113 class informed confirmed that fellow studenttThe Dealer that student Graham Larson began bouncing his right leg up and down at…
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10 Other Places The African Civ Study Abroad Program Could Be Based
By Chase Harrison April 25, 2016 On April 26, the Chicago Maroon reported that beginning in Winter 2018, the University will offer an African Civilizations program in Dakar, Senegal. At the April 15th…
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10 Species That Are Almost Horses
By Ryan Fleishman April 26, 2016 1. Zebras. With their famous black and white stripes, Zebras are essentially angsty, different colored horses. 2. Alpacas. These Peruvian beasts of burden are South America’s horse.…
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Tragedy! Area Student Finishes Her Drink Before the Rest of Her Meal
By Nik Varley April 26, 2016 In an event that can only be described as a tragedy, area student Sarah McDowell finished her drink while she was only halfway through her meal. The…
