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Five Ass Tattoos You Won’t Regret
By Breck Radulovic April 23, 2016 1. An Outline of a Hheart- Turn your own ass into a dry-erase board of love!. Ask your lover to write in their initials with sharpie, and…
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Silly Bandz Craze Sweeps the Supreme Court.
By Breck Radulovic – Washington, D.C., 2010 May 5, 2018 Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg Shows of her Silly Bandz Wow! It’s 2010 and every middle schooler, stoner, and Supreme Court Justice is rocking…
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Jeb Bush Suspends Campaign to Become Inflatable Man outside Car Dealership
By Breck Radulovic Feb. 18, 2016 Former Florida Governor John Ellis “Jeb” Bush has announced he plans to droppped out of the race for the presidency after weak performances in early primaries.…
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University Fails Mental Health Inspection
By Breck Radulovic May 5, 2018 Bartlett Dining Commons The University of Chicago failed an April 16 mental health inspection because of insufficient mental health resources, unsatisfactory support for those in need, and actively hostile…
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What are Your Favorite Presidential Candidates Doing Over Winter Break?
By Breck Radulovic Nov. 19, 2015 10. This holiday season, Jeb Bush will avoid appearing in any family photos. 9. In a break from Trump family tradition, the Donald will give Christmas presents…
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5 Perfect Moments that Will Never Top Leaving the Reg
By Breck Radulovic April 20, 2018 The Joesph Regenstein Library There are but few moments in life that will truly bring joy to the tortured human soul. Among them are winning a Nobel…
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Pearson Institute Established to Resolve Global Conflict Between Econ Majors, Rest of World
By Breck Radulovic Oct. 8, 2015 News of a $100 million donation was well received, with both Economics majors and human beings with souls agreeing that the new Pearson Institute for the Study…
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Botany Pond Ducklings Served at Fourth Meal
By Breck Radulovic April 20, 2018 4th Meal’s Latest Surprise Last Thursday’s Fourth Meal featured a very special menu item. We know what you’re thinking, but this time it wasn’t mozzarella sticks! To…
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Biathlon Fever! The Olympics is Adding Shooting to Every Other Sport!
By Breck Radulovic Feb. 24, 2018 Following public interest in the biathlon, an Olympic sport that combines cross-country skiing and rifle shooting, the International Olympic Committee (IOC) announced that all Olympic sports will…
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Hot New Trend! Steaming Your Vag
By Breck Radulovic Jan. 30, 2018 American actress and professional white woman Gwyneth Paltrow created quite the splash in 2015 when she promoted vaginal steaming, a controversial Los Angeles spa treatment. Personally endorsed by…
