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Masthead

Editors in Chief

Griffin Bonnin Jones, Andrea Zhou

Managing Editor

Katherine Reynolds

Deputy Managing Editor

Vivian Psylos

Layout Editor

Justin Bilenker

Photo Editor

Zayna Cheema

Copy Editors

Nik Ochoa, Chase Teichholz

Disclaimer

Did we hurt your feelings, or say something that “rings untrue” in your soft ears? Well you’re paying too much attention to what we said, and not enough attention to what we meant. God is God, the river is swift, and we don’t give a fuck.

Any complaints can be emailed to [email protected].

Masthead

Editors in Chief

Griffin Bonnin Jones, Andrea Zhou

Managing Editor

Katherine Reynolds

Deputy Managing Editor

Vivian Psylos

Layout Editor

Justin Bilenker

Photo Editor

Zayna Cheema

Copy Editors

Nik Ochoa, Chase Teichholz

Disclaimer

Did we hurt your feelings, or say something that “rings untrue” in your soft ears? Well you’re paying too much attention to what we said, and not enough attention to what we meant. God is God, the river is swift, and we don’t give a fuck.

Any complaints can be emailed to [email protected].

Chicago Shady Dealer

Volume 16 Issue 5

May 21, 2020 /

volume16issue5-1

By Chicago Shady Dealer

Read It and Weep

LA Dodgers Fan finds out the Dodgers are a Baseball team and not a Hat Company
5 Movies to Reject the Christmas Spirit while still saying you’re watching a Christmas Movie
Catholic Family Realizes They’re Nation’s Last Practitioners of the Advent Wreath; Experts Confirm the Three Kings Are “Not Coming, Don’t Wait Up”
UChicago Tour Guide Fired after Confirming “Where Fun Goes to Die” Culture on Tour
Air Force Forms Task Force of Skydiving Spiders
10 Things To Do on Campus This Fall That Feel Almost As Good As Being Loved
Trump claims to have discovered “Constitution 2” allowing him to do whatever he wants
Pumpkin Spice Adderall® now available from your local dealer for your fall-themed 9 hour cram session in the Reg
Karoline Leavitt to respond to CNN journalists with yo mama jokes
President Alivisatos found drunk at frat party after US news report

Chicago Shady Dealer

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