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Masthead

Editors in Chief

Lena Birkholz, Jacob Halabe, Maisie Thompson

Managing Editor

Andrea Zhou

Deputy Managing Editor

Griffin Bonnin Jones

Layout Editor

Abby Beckler

Deputy Layout Editor

Katherine Reynolds

Photo Editor

Zayna Cheema

Copy Editors

Justin Bilenker, Katherine Reynolds

Disclaimer

Did we hurt your feelings, or say something that “rings untrue” in your soft ears? Well you’re paying too much attention to what we said, and not enough attention to what we meant. God is God, the river is swift, and we don’t give a fuck.

Any complaints can be emailed to [email protected].

Masthead

Editors in Chief

Lena Birkholz, Jacob Halabe, Maisie Thompson

Managing Editor

Andrea Zhou

Deputy Managing Editor

Griffin Bonnin Jones

Layout Editor

Abby Beckler

Deputy Layout Editor

Katherine Reynolds

Photo Editor

Zayna Cheema

Copy Editors

Justin Bilenker, Katherine Reynolds

Disclaimer

Did we hurt your feelings, or say something that “rings untrue” in your soft ears? Well you’re paying too much attention to what we said, and not enough attention to what we meant. God is God, the river is swift, and we don’t give a fuck.

Any complaints can be emailed to [email protected].

Chicago Shady Dealer

Volume 16 Issue 5

May 21, 2020 /

volume16issue5-1

By Chicago Shady Dealer

Read It and Weep

New Statement From Hitler: “After Poland I’m Done Bro, Trust Me Bro, Deadass”
They wouldn’t let me into the Donner party and I am IRATE
Crazy New Party Drug Also Good for Surgery
5 Tips to Make Sure You’re the King’s Top Mistress
Simone De Beauvoir Cancels Long-Awaited Sequel The Third Sex
Union Army Morale Skyrockets After President Lincoln’s Stunning Kazoo Solo
New Whig Political Party Objectively Has Stupidest Name
This Snake Oil Stuff Is So Good! Really Delicious You Should Try It I’m Climbing The Walls
Five Romantic Poets Who Definitely Fucked Your Wife
SSRIs Cure Great Depression

Chicago Shady Dealer

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