Missing: Half an Assistant
PENNSYLVANIA — We are sad to report that half of one Cecelia Kasso, magician’s assistant, has gone missing in the previous week. Height 2’10”, wearing high heels and half a dress. Last seen being sawed in half by one Harry Houdini, before announcing he would “make it disappear” to an enthralled audience. The Dealer’s sources report she had recently demanded a pay raise.
Eyewitnesses reported the body could be identified by “a telltale mole above the left ankle,” its signature knee-high red socks, and, of course, by “being two severed and disembodied legs.” If found, please contact the top half of Cecelia Kasso, 327 Fifth Ave, Pittsburgh, PA.