Campus Life

Non-Stem Majors Cheat in Weird Moon Class

Celestial controversy dawned at the University last quarter, as students taking popular core class “Earth as a Planet: Exploring Our Place in the Universe” faced allegations of academic dishonesty regarding the flagship moon journal assignment. Often regarded as an “easy A” for non-science majors seeking to meet their physical sciences requirement, athletes and artists alike were surprised by the difficulty of the moon journal, namely its “complexity,” “rigor” and “intricacies involving looking at the moon and drawing a little picture.”

“So basically we had to write 15 journal entries. Easy, right?” said second-year Creative Writing major Sara Smith. “But the only topic Professor Cisela gave us was all, like, scientific and stuff. I was totally lost. I never thought I would have trouble meeting a word count but here we are.”

“I always did the moon journal in between my sets,” agreed self-identified econ bro Chad Rogers. “I go to the gym at night, so I had to wait until then to do it, which made the moon hard to see since it was so dark out.”

Naturally, some acts of dishonesty were more reprehensible than others. One anonymous third-year who majors in East Asian Languages and Culture and lives in Room 312 in Flint house in Max P stated, “I thought ChatGPT was well trained enough to know about the fucking moon. I mean, come on.”

This individual is among the many who confessed to their terrestrial transgressions, and had to wax and wane for the final, now worth 50% of their quarter grade.

When asked about their key takeaway from this experience, the student stated, “The moon has little gray spots on it if you look really close. That’s pretty tight.”