Off-Campus Life,  World Affairs

Op-Ed: I am an Etsy Seller and I Paid More in Taxes Than Donald Trump

For promotional purposes, I have chosen to identify myself by my Etsy account name, WorkFromHome123. The reason I have taken the time to write this piece is that I am absolutely irate that I have paid more in taxes than the freaking President. Pardon my language.

I wasted all those hours making premium foot earrings when I should’ve just found me a nifty lawyer. Don’t even get me started on the time I’ve spent perfecting my two-headed duckling taxidermy piece (available exclusively at etsy.com/WorkFromHome123).  I have so much duckling blood on my hands! I spent so much money on non-tax-deductible art classes! I ate so much banana-infused foie gras just to become one with the banana duck! 

You know, I’ve worked very hard trying to deliver high-quality products for my clients, and I’ve tried to do my part by paying taxes. But if a man who claims to be worth billions barely pays any taxes, why should I?