It has been twenty days, ten hours, and seventeen minutes since I was promised Godot. I have not left Logan’s Theater West since the show began, ended, began again, ended once more, and began and ended again. Yet still, there is no Godot!
What drove my journey, you may ask? Well, I spent more than 10 hours watching two men waiting for a guy named Godot, so I figured that He must be some really special dude — someone clearly worth waiting a long time for. Therefore, as an opportunistic college student always looking for the next great networking event, I was not going to pass up this rare chance to meet an extremely influential man. Do I know who He is? No, but am I sure that His reference letter will get me very far in life? Absolutely. Forget professors, research advisors, influential bosses, and my father’s friend’s famous brother, Godot is the heavyweight of all recommendation heavyweights. After all, why else would someone write a whole play where all the characters just simply wait for Him?
So, here I am in the darkness of Theater West subsisting solely off of my hoard of stolen dining hall bagels, and the rare scraps pulled from the theater’s floor. I have not talked to anyone in weeks. The only people I see are the janitorial staff, whom I must hide from because they might kick me out. This is a true test of endurance: only the tough will survive to meet Him. I may die of thirst, hunger, or loneliness before ever meeting the legendary Godot, but it will have been worth it because I will have tried my best and clearly was just not good or strong enough to meet His criteria.
Please support me. My supplies are running out and my bank account is almost empty, so I might have to leave the theater and venture to Logan Cafe to beg for sustenance, but I fear that in the moment I step out of the theater, the glorious Godot will enter and I will have missed my one and only opportunity to meet this great man. So if you would like to contribute to my cause, please stop by Theater West in Logan with sustenance. We can wait for Godot together.