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March 16, 2017
It’s an easy relationship trap to fall into: You’re busy, he’s busy. You basically only see each other at the Reg. Studying together is a cornerstone of many relationships at this school. Plus, it’s pretty cute when you work in the same 5th floor double cubicle together. However, women who rely too heavily on their boyfriend’s study spot are signing themselves up for trouble. It is time for lady students everywhere to stand up for themselves and decide on their own study spots.
Some women are more than happy not having to trudge through the Reg for 40 minutes looking for a good spot because their significant other just does it for them. Yes, everyone is tempted to take the easy way out and follow their man to whatever part of the Reg he likes to work in.
But when your study location depends on a man, this gives him too much power and control in the relationship. The next time you catch him looking at hot Tina’s Instagram too many times, what are you going to do? Without your own Reg spot to study in during a fight, you’ll feel less empowered to call him out on his bullshit. And it’s a slippery slope; once he decides where the two of you study, soon he’s going to decide what you eat for dinner and which Snapchat filter you use!
Plus, what happens if you break up? You might get to keep your shared friends and his oversized sweatshirt, but you’ll be left without a secure place to pretend to do your Civ reading. Where are you going to go, Crerar? Gross.
Too many women end up staying with a man who disrespects them because they rely on his Reg spot. You’re going to do whatever he asks because your grades basically depend on his table next to the window.
This is the 21st century; women ought to control their bodies, lean in to their careers, and maintain their own study spots. You’ll feel much more empowered if you find your own comfortable spot–even if it’s on the 2nd floor!–than if you have to ask your boyfriend for permission to use “his” table in the Ancient Near East Languages section.
Moreover, forging your own study spot will give you a confidence boost and take the codependency out of your relationship; you will know that you can survive on your own and that you aren’t just staying with your boyfriend for his study spot.
Like Virginia Woolf once wrote in A Room of One’s Own: “A woman must have money and a study spot of her own if she is to write Sosc essays.”
Let us all be #independentwomen together. Take a picture of your study spot and tweet @chishadydealer with #neednomansueto.
