Chicago Shady Dealer

Answers to The Four Questions of Passover

By President Donald Trump
April 13, 2017

Answers to The Four QuestionsBy Donald Trump Q: On all other nights, we eat chameitz and matzah. Why on this night, only matzah?

A: First of all, matzah, by the way, I love matzah. It’s probably my favorite cracker. Chameitz has been a tremendous disaster. Nobody talks about it. But we’re going to have the best matzah, believe me.

Q: On all other nights, we eat all vegetables. Why, on this night, maror?

A: I know more about maror than the rabbis do. Believe me. It’s a great herb. It’s really great. Everybody wants to know why we eat maror. And you know what I tell them? I tell them, we have a foolproof plan for eating maror.

Q: On all other nights, we don’t dip vegetables even once. Why on this night do we dip twice?

A: I have to say, a lot of people have been asking this question. No, really. A lot of people come up to me and they ask me, they say, why twice? And I tell them, look, we’re gonna dip so much you’ll get tired of dipping.

Q: On all other nights, we eat either sitting upright or reclining. Why on this night do we all recline?

A: We have the best recliners. Beautiful chairs. Gorgeous. The best chairs.