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Masthead

Editors in Chief

Griffin Bonnin Jones, Andrea Zhou

Managing Editor

Katherine Reynolds

Deputy Managing Editor

Vivian Psylos

Layout Editor

Justin Bilenker

Photo Editor

Zayna Cheema

Copy Editors

Nik Ochoa, Chase Teichholz

Disclaimer

Did we hurt your feelings, or say something that “rings untrue” in your soft ears? Well you’re paying too much attention to what we said, and not enough attention to what we meant. God is God, the river is swift, and we don’t give a fuck.

Any complaints can be emailed to [email protected].

  • COVID Special Issue

    Report: Fourth Years Graduating into the Pandemic

    Chicago Shady Dealer / February 19, 2021

    College graduation is one of life’s last clean transitions, a final passage from adolescence to adulthood that is predictable in ways other transitions rarely are. College is one of the only things in…

    read more
  • COVID Special Issue

    Public School During a Pandemic: CPS’ Rocky Year

    Chicago Shady Dealer / February 19, 2021

    CPS has released a daring plan to resume in-person instruction after nearly a year of online learning. The key element? Hourly COVID testing.

    read more
  • COVID Special Issue

    The Carillon Guild: Before and After the Pandemic

    The Master Carillonneur / February 19, 2021

    It was a cold morning, I remember thinking that it had probably rained last night. I’m pretty good at telling when it’s recently rained. I’m actually just pretty good at meteorology stuff in…

    read more
  • COVID Special Issue

    9,300 Miles and 14 Hours Away, International Students Struggle With Attending UChicago Virtually

    Chicago Shady Dealer / February 19, 2021

    “It’s actually been really nice,” said third-year Fig Newton, currently located in Singapore. “Because all of my classes are from 1 a.m. to 4 a.m. my time, I barely see my family. I’ve…

    read more
  • COVID Special Issue

    “A Fatiguing Journey”: A Frontline Worker at UChicago Hospital Reflects

    Chicago Shady Dealer / February 19, 2021

    “Because of COVID,” Orst said, “elevators have been at limited capacity. I’ve had to take the stairs to move my liquids from Floor 4 to Floor 5. Do you know how long it…

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  • COVID Special Issue

    Students Collect Oral History of Frontline Workers During Pandemic

    Chicago Shady Dealer / February 19, 2021

    The oral history tracks the dental health and oral hygiene of a selected group of UChicago Medicine patients through weekly interviews. “I’d ask someone to report to me about their molars and we’d…

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  • COVID Special Issue

    First-Year Experiences During a Quarter of Firsts

    Jordan Norberto / February 19, 2021

    As a first-year college student, I feel privileged to be among the select group of students experiencing college for the first time through the lens of remote learning. As such, I am preparing…

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  • COVID Special Issue

    344 Days of Isolation: The Dealer’s COVID Retrospective

    Chicago Shady Dealer / February 19, 2021

    Today, the Shady Dealer is proud to be the very first UChicago publication to release a coronavirus retrospective issue. We’d like to stress that all of the content in our retrospective is 100%…

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Newer Posts 

Read It and Weep

  • Point: Someday, you’ll be forgotten by history / Counterpoint: I sold some really bad copper
  • Andrew Cuomo announces 2028 presidential campaign
  • Heists are back baby! Let’s steal the haunted amulet in the basement of Mansueto
  • Confused Animal Rights Group seen protesting outside NFL HQ after Bad Bunny announcement
  • Religious Studies Class Taught by Pope Leo XIV Cancelled Due to Federal Cuts
  • Trump accidentally destroys East Wing of Woodlawn
  • All Microeconomics 101 Students Swapped into Beginner Akkadian in Add-Drop Fiasco
  • First Year Formally Reprimanded for Failing to Intellectualize Homesickness
  • University to introduce affirmative action for guys named Sean (Shaun and Shawn excluded)
  • In his second memoir, “Ignore My First One,” Vance reveals that the root of his anger toward Zelensky was his thick lashes.

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