Students Fight to Save Summer Lynx

By Alex Dunlap

Feb. 22, 2014

A group calling itself “Save the Summer Lynx” has raised concerns that changes in University policy may pose an “existential threat” to the future of the endangered Summer Lynx (Lynx veranensis). Native to Hyde Park and surrounding regions, the Summer Lynx was once a common sight around Hyde Park, but is now in danger of population decline or extinction due to increased commercial harvesting and elevated levels of toxic bullshit in its immediate environment. Even captive populations of Summer Lynx have been suffering due to poor natural lighting conditions stemming from a local lack of transparency.

Although Summer Lynx in Hyde Park have long been trapped in small numbers for research and conservation purposes, the University plans to relax policies restricting commercial harvesting of the Summer Lynx, which scientists have warned could prove disastrous for the species’ future. The fur of the Summer Lynx is prized for its use in high-end résumé pads, and oil produced by the animals’ glands is important in the production of several popular corporate-whitewash chemicals. Demand for trapping permits is thus expected to be high.

“In previous years, you could only trap Summer Lynx on University grounds if it was for research or conservation purposes,” explained third-year Save the Summer Lynx activist Wanda Jefferson. “But UChicago has changed that policy, allowing for-profit third parties to trap and kill Summer Lynx for use in commercial production. This is completely antithetical to the role that Summer Lynx have always played in our community.”

The prospect of increased trapping of the Summer Lynx is especially concerning to ecologists because populations are already suffering from elevated bullshit pollution in Hyde Park. “While the Summer Lynx is relatively tolerant of many common pollutants, the species is extremely sensitive to bullshit levels in its environment,” said Dr. Harry Everson, an Environmental Protection Agency scientist working with Save the Summer Lynx. “Historically, Hyde Park has been home to moderate background levels of bullshit, mostly due to runoff from first-year Hum discussions and point-source effluent from the administration building. This year, however, the University has been spewing increasing amounts of bullshit directly into key Summer Lynx habitat. Unless swift action is taken to stop this pollution and clean up the dangerously-high levels of bullshit already present in the environment, the fate of the Summer Lynx may be sealed.”

Also of concern to conservationists are changes in the conditions of Summer Lynx kept in captivity for research purposes on campus. Individual Summer Lynx need large amounts of sunlight to remain healthy and active, so the animals are traditionally kept in glass-walled or open-air enclosures. Recent changes in operating policies have led to a decrease in transparency surrounding the Summer Lynx, to the point that some individuals are kept in blacked-out cages, only given access to natural light for one to two hours per day. “Transparency is an important part of the proper management of the Summer Lynx,” said Jefferson. “Not only is keeping the Summer Lynx in the dark bad for the health of the animals, but who knows what they’re doing to the Summer Lynx when they’re kept where we can’t see them?”

In a statement released last week, the University dismissed claims that new policies would be detrimental to Summer Lynx populations, noting that the Office of Sustainability had been tasked with developing policiespromoting the continued health of the Summer Lynx population, in line with the larger interests of the University. (The official previously in charge of management of Summer Lynx populations was fired last summer during what the University described as a “restructuring of our approach to Summer Lynx and related species.”) The University moreover praised “connections between the public, nonprofit, and private sectors that are created by allowing multiple uses of the Summer Lynx,” and expressed an interest in “moving forward with constructive discussion about this important issue, in accordance with our long-held values of free expression.”