Dec. 5, 2016
1. Deborah, 53, Hospital Administrator: I love popping into the nNew Target™ on 53rd after a long week at work. I’ll pick up a single-serving Marie Callender’s and a double bottle of Barefoot Pink Rosé… just for myself! Sometimes I just can’t say no to the latest issue of O Magazine and fun-size pack of M&M’s at the checkout counter. It’s a such naughty way to end the week, but no one has to know but me, myself, and I. 😉
2. Meredith, 19, Vegan and Marxist: While usually I hate capitalism, the nNew Target™ on 53rd makes me forget about everything I learned from reading Capital when I was a junior in high school. Last Saturday I grabbed some vegetarian chick’n nuggets, an organic hemp charcoal face mask, and a cool Frida Kahlo slogan tee. Then my Riot Grrrl zine club came over to my co-op and we drank black Target brand coffee and dyed each other’s armpit hair with Manic Panic hair dye.
3. Carrie and Ana, 24 and 26, Graduate Students in the SSA: We love having date night at the nNew Target™ on 53rd. First, we like to browse the flannel section and make sure we aren’t missing any color schemes in our joint wardrobe. Then we like to stock up on the microbrewery craft IPAs and Biore pore strips. You know it’s true love when you can wear matching flannel shirts and do pore strips together while watching Carol.
4. Professor f. Lyn, 42, Chemistry Professor: I would give an unabashed endorsement of the nNew Target™ on 53rd, but sometimes it’s a little awkward running into current students. They’re thinking about how I just gave them a 23% on their midterm and I’m hoping they don’t notice the piles of lube, condoms, and hot sauce in my basket.
5. Brett, 21, Fraternity Brother: To be honest, when the nNew Target™ asked be for my opinion on how to have a great girl’s night in, I was a little taken aback. Usually I’m the one in the girls, if you know what I mean. Haha. But seriously, when I’m looking to have a nice, lowkey night in I’ll definitely hit up NNew Target™ for some moisturizer, scented candles, bubble bath, and a fresh 30-rack. The moisturizer’s not for that, ya perv! I have dry skin too! Jeez.