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May 15, 2017
“It is just such a waste,” lamented Phi Gamma Delta’s Social Chair Josh Henderson. “Months of work went into this theme – all those months, down the drain.” Henderson’s comments refer to an incident that occurred last Friday – a construction themed party thrown by Phi Gamma Delta (FIJI) planned to fall on Cinco de Mayo.
Henderson gave a generous tour of the brothers’ house, hoping to shed some light on why so many members of FIJI were hesitant to let go of the theme. He admitted that many students and organizations on campus had reached out to let them know that the implications of the party were racist. “Yeah, we were told that our actions might reinforce stereotypes of Latino populations, but – they just must not have known how much effort we put into this theme! We can’t change it, just like that,” Henderson pressed. “Do you know how many construction hat cupcake toppers I made? Over two hundred! I spent a fortune on fondant!”
His distress was easy to see as he gestured brokenly to tables covered with mini edible traffic cones and shovel shaped lollipops. “I had to delete my Pinterest. I’ve curated that Pinterest since our Sangria Soiree – and now it’s like that doesn’t even matter.”
When asked why some members arrived to the party still sporting construction gear, despite numerous warnings of the connotations, Henderson openly wept. “I guess they couldn’t just let it go, you know?” His voice caught, but he continued. “Some of the pledges filled and decorated mason jars for hours. They have blisters on their thumbs. I truly believe that their only crime … is caring too much.”
A similar misfortune was visited upon a fellow fraternity earlier this year, when Sig Ep was asked to change a potentially offensive mixer theme. The president’s reaction, taken from his text messages, was as follows, “Oh, oh, yeah. You’re right. New theme is … um … Under the Sea? Yeah, whatever. Under the Sea, let’s do that.”
Henderson was left staring forlornly at a moodboard covered in feathers and dreamcatchers, muttering, “I bet we have to cancel this one, too.”
