Chalk to be replaced with humongous chalkboard

By Mark Sands

April 25, 2013

The University of Chicago Office of the Registrar announced today its decision to replace the online Chalk system with a gigantic chalkboard. After cMore was closed in favor of myUChicago to cheers from the student body, the University next set its sights on the Chalk interface, which has been occasionally criticized for making it difficult to find important assignment information.

Concluding that this information would be easier to manage in a public way, where none of it was ever difficult to find, University President Robert Zimmer has suggested “Chalkboard”, a new system that places a giant chalkboard in the middle of the Main Quad, detailing all information any student could possibly want to know.

University legal counsel has not yet been consulted regarding this decision, but President Zimmer is “sure they’ll find a way to do it.” The University has also yet to figure out where to acquire such a chalkboard, or how students will be able to see the top of it.

“I’m sure these minor details can be worked out as we finish the transition,” said President Zimmer , before adding that he’d like to “preemptively announce” that Chalk will be going offline next week.

President Zimmer, who was a math professor before joining the administration, did not comment on whether this new chalkboard would have sliding sections like those in many campus buildings, and if it does, how students would be able to access the covered-up parts.