Woodlawn to host a bake sale to raise money for new carpet! Cupcakes $20,000 each
After Woodlawn Residential Commons’ most recent vandalism scandal, a certain carpet company that “is absolutely not laundering money” has quoted $250,000 to repair the damaged carpet. This cost has fallen to Woodlawn residents, who have come up with a solution to raise the money: a bake sale!
“Make no mistake, this is not your average bakesale,” says Woodlawn resident Overa Chiever. “This is a UChicago exclusive bakesale. Please, buy a Marx Macaron. Or perhaps a Core Cupcake.”
Each cupcake will be priced at $20,000 in order to cover the cost of the renovations. Additionally, the bake sale operators offer a free cake in the shape of your favorite administrator if you bring credible information on the identities of the vandals. The bake sale will be held this weekend from 1 to 5 pm–and every weekend until they can raise enough money.
“I would really love to contribute to the bake sale,” said Woodlawn East Resident Dean 1, “but I’m afraid I might have to Klarna a slice of cake.”
Pauline Singer
