Number Without Units Hilarious

By Morgan Pantuck

Oct. 19, 2015

Persons close to the situation report that a dimensionless number that was just spoken aloud by area woman Christina Wilkins is, indeed, hilarious. The figure was uttered when Wilkin’s roommate Molly asked the question, “How excited are you for Taco Tuesday?” While Molly was expecting Christina to answer, “So excited!”, she instead replied “Twelve.”

“Twelve what? Units of excitedness? We’ll never know!” Molly explained to the Dealer during an exclusive interview. “Twelve seems like a lot, but without a physical dimension, it means nothing and everything at the same time.”

“Get it?” she added, suppressing a giggle. “It’s funny because twelve is a totally abstract concept.”

According to the Dealer’s sources, that Wilkins has startled audiences with this type of comedy before. For example, when fellow-classmate Kevin Steinberg asked, “How many hours should I study for the midterm?”, Wilkins responded, “All of them.”

“All of them… as in, all 24 hours in one day, or as in the entire duration of my life?” Steinberg later wondered, smirking in a bemused way. “Or does it that also include time in a cosmic sense, like, including the hours before I was born and after I die?”

At press time, Wilkins was telling her boyfriend that she loves him “so many.”