How to Deal With Writer’s Block: A Shady Guide
Greetings, fellow writers! In this handy guide, I’ll be educating you all on how to deal with writer’s block. Regardless of whether you are writing a news article, paper, or discussion post, this guide is perfect for you. If you need help meeting a word count of, let’s say, 350 words (including a headline/title and headings), simply follow these instructions.
What to Do When You’re Hitting a Wall
You’ve just finished writing that big, sexy hook of an intro, and now you have no idea what to write next. Fear not! If you have an idea of what you want to write, but no idea how to say it, just try putting down some words conveying your idea and you don’t care about grammar or anything, and also you don’t care about extra words either or run-on sentences since you can always edit them out later, or you can even keep them in if you need the words. If you have no clue what to write, then you could take a quick break and come back later for a better chance of having a good idea.
Control Your Writer’s Block and Use It to Your Advantage
As they say, what is a block if not something to stand on? If you can’t think of a good transition from your previous sentence, you can always rewrite your previous sentence to say something completely different. Or, you can always just use a dislocated rhetorical question to seamlessly transition into your next idea. If you need help ending your paragraph or chapter, then you can try putting in something that doesn’t require any afterthought, such as a meaningless exclamation. Hip hip hooray!
Plagiarize
Sike! Just kidding! Don’t plagiarize. If you do, definitely don’t get caught. Plagiarism is bad, and an intellectual crime. Taking inspiration, however, is not bad, and not an intellectual crime. So go read things, and write similar things to what you read. That being said, thank you for reading, and hopefully using, this guide. Happy writing, and chazak, chazak, v’nitchazek!
Justin Bilenker
Copy Editor 2023-2025
Emperor 2025-2026
