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June 25, 2016
Don’t go changing your flag just yet, because we have an offer for you. You’ve got a vacancy, and we want in. That’s right: The Ruttenberg Family wants to join the European Union.
We have a lot to offer you, and I’m sure you have a lot to offer us. Mother Ruttenberg makes a delicious paella, and open trade between us would all but guarantee that Felipé VI will get a big spoonful of that. Papa Ruttenberg is working on his golf game, so you can bet after those European Union meetings there are gonna be some putts on the green.
In addition, with the free borders between our countries, anyone from Lithuania, Bosnia, or any of your other wonderful nations would be free to visit our home on 61 Park Street, Newton MA. We just renovated our patio, so have at it! If you want, we’d even be happy to host the next Eurovision competition, but watch out! Little Baby Ruttenberg has been taking vocal lessons.
