New Optimus Parm food truck sells Italian food, fights crime
By Daniel Moattar
Nov. 12, 2012
In recent days, Hyde Park’s food truck craze has taken on a new dimension: the endless war against evil. A new red-and-blue cart can be found sitting at the corner of 58th and Ellis most Thursday afternoons, hawking hot calzones. The only clue as to its origins is a sign above the window reading “Optimus Parm: Homestyle Italian Delights.”
“$6.75 seems like a lot for a meatball sub, but he did save my girlfriend from that runaway bus once I bought it,” said second-year public policy major Zane Carmichael. “Also, it got kind of smushed when he turned back into a [food] truck.” While the expense of continually repaving Ellis Avenue continues to mount, popular enthusiasm for Optimus Parm has tied the administration’s hands. “This calzone [really] sucks,” said fourth-year French literature and history major Christine Rabanne.
Popular menu items include the titular Optimus Parm ($6.75), which includes meatballs, parmesan cheese, cilantro, and oregano in a machine-oil sauce, and the perennial favorite Galactus ($9.95), two calzones in a box.
College Dean John Boyer was unavailable to comment on speculation that the Max Palevsky East, West, and Central dormitories are also giant robots.
