Home
About Us
Previous Issues
Our Greatest Hits
Submissions

Home
About Us
Previous Issues
Our Greatest Hits
Submissions

Masthead

Editors in Chief

Lena Birkholz, Jacob Halabe, Maisie Thompson

Managing Editor

Andrea Zhou

Deputy Managing Editor

Griffin Bonnin Jones

Layout Editor

Abby Beckler

Deputy Layout Editor

Katherine Reynolds

Photo Editor

Zayna Cheema

Copy Editors

Justin Bilenker, Katherine Reynolds

Disclaimer

Did we hurt your feelings, or say something that “rings untrue” in your soft ears? Well you’re paying too much attention to what we said, and not enough attention to what we meant. God is God, the river is swift, and we don’t give a fuck.

Any complaints can be emailed to [email protected].

Masthead

Editors in Chief

Lena Birkholz, Jacob Halabe, Maisie Thompson

Managing Editor

Andrea Zhou

Deputy Managing Editor

Griffin Bonnin Jones

Layout Editor

Abby Beckler

Deputy Layout Editor

Katherine Reynolds

Photo Editor

Zayna Cheema

Copy Editors

Justin Bilenker, Katherine Reynolds

Disclaimer

Did we hurt your feelings, or say something that “rings untrue” in your soft ears? Well you’re paying too much attention to what we said, and not enough attention to what we meant. God is God, the river is swift, and we don’t give a fuck.

Any complaints can be emailed to [email protected].

Chicago Shady Dealer

Ghost Haunting White House Rose Garden Revealed to be Ted Cruz

March 16, 2013 /

By Breck Radulovic

Jan. 5, 2016

By Chicago Shady Dealer

You May Also Like

How to Deal With Writer’s Block: A Shady Guide

April 5, 2025

Squid Game Review

October 26, 2021

UChicago Wifi Ranked #333,333,333 by US News and World Report

November 23, 2019

Read It and Weep

Northwestern University Kidnaps Phil the Phoenix as “Revenge” for US News Ranking
Top 10 Places to Cry on Campus
House Council Begs First Years to Carry On Legacy
First Year accidentally goes to bed before 3 AM, profusely apologizes
Op-Ed: My mom had one Tylenol, my dad is circumsized, and I really like trains
“Yes, I’m a Baller” Says Mamdani After Cuomo Accuses Him of Being LeBron James in Disguise
“Have You Heard of Dr. Seuss?” Asks Guy Who Just Found Out About Dr. Seuss
First-Year Declares Intent to Speed-Run College
White House Downplays Reports of Trump, Epstein “I Heart Pedophilia” Friendship Bracelets
Virtual Reality Game Sucker Debuts to Much Fanfare

Chicago Shady Dealer

Home
About Us
Previous Issues
Our Greatest Hits
Submissions

Archives

Archives

Categories

Categories

For Writers

Log in
Entries feed
Comments feed
WordPress.org

Facebook
Twitter
Instagram

© 2025 Chicago Shady Dealer

Home
About Us
Previous Issues
Our Greatest Hits
Submissions

Ashe Theme by WP Royal.