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Five Sex Tips So Good, You’ll Forget You’ve Never Had a Vaginal Orgasm
By Becky Stoner April 25, 2015 1. If your man’s not getting the job done, take matters into your own hands. While he’s on top of you, grunting his way towards climax, take…
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CPD Aims to Strengthen Community Relationships with “Fuck the Police” Initiative
By Alex Dunlap March 1, 2015 The Chicago Police Department announced this week a groundbreaking initiative that aims to “rethink the way that citizens interact with their police force,” according to a statement…
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Swedish Teens Not Very Excited About Swedish Beatles
By Chris Deakin Feb. 1, 2015 In what comes as surprising news for record executives and music critics alike, the young people of Sweden have not responded to the Swedish Beatles with the…
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Everyone Around Me Kissing??
By Evan Bernstein Jan. 2, 2015 What?? Why?? I don’t understand!! We were all just standing around having a good time and then- what?? Everyone started kissing! Each other! With their mouths! They’re…
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Uber Driver Crosses into Non-Delightful Racism
By Si Squires-Kasten Nov. 26, 2014 During a ride Thursday morning to Logan International Airport, Uber driver Travis Murphy moved without warning from lighthearted racial observations into what several sources confirms was “flat…
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Dad Unexpectedly Hot
By Sam Buck and Hannah Flynn Nov. 16, 2014 First-year student Sandy Livingston was awestruck on meeting roommate Mindy Belindi’s father this past Thanksgiving break. Livingston claims her roommate’s father is the first…
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University Librarian Tears into Pages
By Alexander Dunlap Oct. 24, 2014 Newly appointed University Librarian Brenda Johnson launched a spirited attack on the pages of the University’s libraries today, calling them “spineless good-for-nothings incapable of recalling instructions for…
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LD Break-Up Mad Libs
By Morgan Pantuck Aug. 1, 2014 LDR Break-Up Mad Libs By Morgan Pantuck Dear Sam, We need to [verb]. I know that we wanted to give long-distance a/an [adjective] shot, and that I…
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Christie’s Take from Internship Auction Tops Expectations
By Anna Newport April 20, 2014 Anxious parents flooded Christie’s on Thursday as the auction house staged its first internship bidding war. With record high numbers of applicants for Christie’s 2013 unpaid internship…
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Chicago Shady Dealer Calling It Quits
By James Ekstrom and Chris Deakin April 1, 2014 To Whom it May Concern: After nearly 10 years as a publication, it has come to our attention that the editorial board, along with…
