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20 Ways to Please Your Man
By Evan Bernstein April 23, 2015 20 Ways to Please Your Man These twenty tips are sure to spice things up in the bedroom, shower, or empty train car! 1. Touch it Touching…
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UChicago College Admissions Releases Extended Essay Prompts for 2013-2014
By Robin Ye April 23, 2013 2013-2014 Essay Questions: ESSAY OPTION 1 There are many things people DGAF about. Write a passionate essay on something you don’t give a fuck about. Inspired by…
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4 Drawers Your Parents Definitely Shouldn’t Open This Family Weekend
By Zakir Jamal Oct. 17, 2017 4 Drawers Your Parents Definitely Shouldn’t Open This Family Weekend 1. The bottom drawer of your dresser Shit — this is where you keep most of the…
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5 Albums You Should Only Masturbate To On Vinyl
By Teddy Zamborsky May 13, 2016 1. Exile on Mainstreet – The Rolling Stones Can you think of a better album to shake your hips,s, and your spidermonkey, to in its original analog…
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End Body Shaming!
By Morgan Pantuck Dec. 30, 2014 Point: End Body Shaming Now! People don’t like to hear that the media influences their most personal thoughts and feelings, but it’s true. Television, movies, the music…
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Homeless Man Fined for Littering Himself
By Mark Boykin Dec. 17, 2012 A man living on the streets of Chicago was fined $300 dollars for littering when a policeman found him sleeping in an alleyway. Cedric Galloway, the homeless…
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Turning Point? Vanilla Ice Denounces Donald Trump!
By Ryan Fleishman March 27, 2017 President Trump and his administration have conducted a veritable campaign of fear across American politics over the first three months of his presidency. Many people and celebrities…
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All the Star Wars Movies, Ranked
By Daniel Ruttenberg, 2046 Jan. 22, 2016 Star Wars Episode XVIII: The Roast of Chewbacca Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope Star Wars Episode…
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I Don’t Believe in Gay Marriage
By Morgan Pantuck May 13, 2014 Look, I know this isn’t the “politically correct” thing to say these days, but I have to get something off my chest. I don’t believe in gay…
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Trump Summons Backup Collection of Balding White Men from White House Storage Cabinet After Sessions Resignation
By Kelly Tsing Sum Lo Nov. 7, 2018 Former Attorney General Jeff Sessions, a man described by friends as “the world’s least magical elf”, resigned earlier today in a move that marks…