To the Class of 2024:
We know this isn’t how you wanted your time in college to start. You wanted to spend Orientation Week with several dozen of your newest friends and an ungodly amount of alcohol, not on a Zoom call from your childhood twin bed. You were supposed to be sitting at a cubicle in the Reg when you got your first failing grade on a paper. You wanted to make friends that you knew for certain were not golden retrievers who learned to type.
COVID-19, of course, has made all of that impossible. Frankly, you should have known that a school with a phoenix in its seal would eventually become a glorified version of the University of Phoenix, but we’ll let that slide. Now that our quarter of online learning is about to start, though, we’d like to offer you some useful advice. Whenever you’re frustrated with Zoom, or feeling isolated from your social support network, just remember this simple phrase: “There’s always winter quarter“.
When will we all be able to meet in person again? There’s always winter quarter. When winter quarter comes, COVID-19 will be under control, and we’ll finally get the benefits of an in-person education. Rest assured, the hope that we have for winter quarter is genuine, and we’re sure that when winter quarter comes along, the University won’t pull the rug out from under us yet again.
Of course, it is unhealthy to fixate on winter quarter as the potential solution to every single one of your problems. And the mere fact that it’s not winter quarter yet shouldn’t stop you from attempting to enjoy a limited college experience. But when the going gets tough this quarter — and it will — we hope it will help you to remember that winter quarter is not that far away, and once it arrives, you’ll finally get to see what all the fuss is about UChicago.
The Optimists at the Shady Dealer