By Reed Thurston Oct. 18, 2017 Listen: Forget everything you thought you knew about dumplings until now. Coming this month to rock the foodie scene in Hyde Park is PACKED, a new kind…

By Jacob Levin May 14, 2016 According to sources close to the Shady Dealer, people of the Vincent House lounge silently and unanimously voted to say nothing about the massive fart unleashed by…

By Willamina Groething Feb. 1, 2015 WESTMALLE 8th of November in the Year of our Lord 1512 In what was termed a “demoralizing defeat,” the Belgian La-Cross team from the Abdij van Onze-Lieve-Vrouw…

By Jesus Feb. 4, 2013 Jesus Christ @Jesus Just drinkin sum wyne wif mah crew. We rollin 13 deep #YOLO #getschwasted @God Judas @Judas Things were a bit awkward at dinner; hope Jesus…

By Ryan Fleishman May 16, 2017 Local Horse Festival Immediately Followed By Local Glue Festival The Chicago Horse Festival, Aafter rocking the foundations of the city Chicago with their awesome celebration of and…

By Walker King Feb. 22, 2016 I was going through my old boxes of high school things the other day when I came across an old mixtape. , https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1v2eMiNl1Tz2W6w0n-ha43XrxxsRrzWw_OiK_ola-s6w/edit?usp=sharingRRachel, mMmy high school girlfriend,…

By Isaac Krone Nov. 16, 2014 At a quarterly conference on seasonal fashion held Wednesday, the president of Omega Phi Pi announced that raccoons are officially “in” for winter. As a consequence, the…

By Hannah Gitlin Oct. 21, 2012 Students at the University of Chicago were surprised when, on October 5th, University alumnus Arley D. Cathey, Ph.B ’50, acquired the naming rights to Eric Greene, a…

By Thomas Noriega March 2, 2017 In a university-first eventFor the first time in the In a university-first event, our oldest south-side dorm has been hyphenated from the ground-up. After the runaway successes…

By Milena Pross Jan. 4, 2016 I was so excited to have a roommate in college.F from first impressions alone, Edna seemed great. But we’re a quarter in, and I’m requesting to move…