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The Bachelor Final Rose to Go to Living Windmill That Speaks Exclusively in Plane Puns
Sources from ABC had claimed that the ending of The Bachelor would not be spoiled, but Reality Steve strikes again! The gossip blog has revealed that this season’s final rose will go to a living, breathing windmill that speaks exclusively in plane puns. From Reality Steve’s most recent blog post: “Pilot Pete will give the final rose to a humanoid windmill that communicates exclusively with phrases like ‘that outfit really stuck the landing, pilot!’ and ‘are we in first class? Because my towelette is moist.’ The windmill’s name is Courtney. She has a southern accent that mysteriously appears and disappears depending on whether Pilot Pete is nearby, and she has…
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Thanksgiving Explained by an International Student
So first they roast a turkey, right, and then sometimes they put other birds inside the turkey and roast those too, and they call it a turduckoose or a turchicken or something. And then they get in line with all their cousins from Arkansas and wait to cut pieces out of this wobbly cranberry jello from a can, and then they cover the turkey with the jello and eat it all together. Also, you’re not supposed to season the turkey when you roast it because then the seasoning will overpower the taste of the jello. The goal is to make the turkey as dry as possible so that the jello…
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