WASHINGTON\u2014Responding to critics who fear there\u2019s no end in sight to the war in Iran, President Trump on Tuesday assured the American people that military operations will last no longer than six weeks, five minutes, or seventeen years.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThis is gonna be over so fast, you\u2019re not even gonna believe it,\u201d Trump told a gaggle of reporters. \u201cThis is gonna be\u2014look, in six weeks, this is gonna be done. History. OK? It\u2019s not even gonna be something you\u2019ll remember. Believe me. OK? In five minutes, it\u2019ll be over. Literally, five minutes from now the war will be over.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Pressed again on whether it was realistic to suppose that the war would be over in a mere five minutes, the president struck a defiant tone, saying, \u201cWhat a nasty question. What a nasty question, OK? It\u2019s realistic. It\u2019s as realistic as\u2014the war is already over. It ended three weeks ago. It ended before it even began. It ended in 642 AD, which by the way means After Christ. Why is it a D? Nobody knows. In 642, 42, folks, when the Sasanians\u2014they fell to the Rashidun Caliphate in the Battle of Nahavand. The war will end on the Fourth of July. It will end in seventeen years\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When asked to comment on the president\u2019s timetable, Secretary of Defense and\/or War Pete Hegseth told the Dealer<\/em>, \u201cHuhh. Where\u2014[hiccough]\u2014where am I? Where did I\u2026shittttttt I need a goddamn drink. Where\u2019d my\u2014where\u2019d my\u2014goddamm it son of a bitch I need some vodka. Goddamn son of a bitch. Goddamn.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The war in Iran has thrown the global economy into chaos and sent gas prices soaring. It has also killed thousands of Iranians probably, but they live very far away and aren\u2019t Americans. So it probably isn\u2019t very important.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" \u201cThis is gonna be over so fast, you\u2019re not even gonna believe it,\u201d Trump told a gaggle of reporters. \u201cThis is gonna be\u2014look, in six weeks, this is gonna be done. History. OK? It\u2019s not even gonna be something you\u2019ll remember. Believe me. OK? In five minutes, it\u2019ll be over. Literally, five minutes from now the war will be over.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2089,"featured_media":7619,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,17],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7618","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-politics","category-world-affairs"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7618","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2089"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7618"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7618\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7620,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7618\/revisions\/7620"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/7619"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7618"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7618"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7618"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}