{"id":7272,"date":"2025-10-11T10:29:55","date_gmt":"2025-10-11T15:29:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/?p=7272"},"modified":"2025-10-11T10:29:55","modified_gmt":"2025-10-11T15:29:55","slug":"first-year-declares-intent-to-speed-run-college","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/2025\/10\/11\/first-year-declares-intent-to-speed-run-college\/","title":{"rendered":"First-Year Declares Intent to Speed-Run College"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Buckle up\u2014first-year Henry Pacemaker has declared his intention to finish college in just one year and graduate with the Class of 2026. If successful, he would defeat the current record held by Jack McSprint, an alumnus who graduated with the Class of 1994 in two and a half years with a Bachelor of Arts in Philosophy.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A faculty member who spoke on condition of anonymity told the <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dealer<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> that they had received several dozen petitions from Pacekamer to take additional classes in less than two weeks. Each petition included Pacemaker\u2019s Venmo username and an offer to pay $1,000 for every approval. The faculty member stated that the office has not yet reached a decision regarding these petitions.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Pacemaker, however, is confident that his petitions will succeed. \u201cHaving 14 classes a quarter is the minimum I\u2019ll accept,\u201d he told the <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dealer<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> in an exclusive interview. \u201cWe need 42 classes to graduate, so this works out evenly. Besides, it\u2019s a win-win. I get to save a couple hundred thousand in tuition money, and they get a couple extra thousand dollars from me this year and an extra spot for a transfer student who has to pay this tuition next year.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cI\u2019m graduating with a degree in Philosophy,\u201d he explained. \u201cMcSprint is a huge inspiration to me, and I hope to follow in his footsteps\u2014only a lot quicker.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dealer <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">also spoke to McSprint for his thoughts on Pacemaker\u2019s endeavor. \u201cWhatever he ends up saving on tuition will be spent on energy drinks, caffeine tablets, and decades of therapy,\u201d he said. \u201cSo, all in all, a much better use of money.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>If successful, he would defeat the current record held by Jack McSprint, an alumnus who graduated with the Class of 1994 in two and a half years with a Bachelor of Arts in Philosophy.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2086,"featured_media":7273,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[13],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7272","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-campus-life"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7272","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2086"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7272"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7272\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7274,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7272\/revisions\/7274"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/7273"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7272"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7272"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7272"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}