{"id":6917,"date":"2025-03-10T10:54:08","date_gmt":"2025-03-10T15:54:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/?p=6917"},"modified":"2025-03-09T20:58:37","modified_gmt":"2025-03-10T01:58:37","slug":"uchicago-student-devastated-by-a-grade","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/2025\/03\/10\/uchicago-student-devastated-by-a-grade\/","title":{"rendered":"UChicago Student Devastated By \u201cA\u201d Grade"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Reginald Sniffington, a first-year University of Chicago student, was reportedly devastated today after receiving an \u201cA\u201d grade in his Power, Identity, Resistance class. With<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">noticeably red, puffy eyes, he told the Dealer, \u201cThe once-sacrosanct standards of academic rigor at this university have catastrophically declined. I made several trivial blunders while formulating my final essay, and yet I still received an exemplary grade in Power.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When asked about his mistakes, Sniffington admitted, \u201cI used slightly imprecise word choice in the fifth sentence of my fourth paragraph, and, most embarrassingly, I negligently used MLA instead of Chicago style citations. I feel like such a fraud!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sniffington demanded swift action from University administration, calling for the course instructor to be \u201cfired forthwith and replaced by someone who respects the sacred history of the Chicago Canon\u201d and for his course grade to be \u201cpromptly lowered to a B+, which is what I deserve.\u201d He warned, shuddering, that if these actions were not undertaken, the University of Chicago might \u201csink to the level of a second-rate institution, such as Northwestern or Yale.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">After another student remarked that they had also received an A in the course, Reginald began hyperventilating and fled to his dorm, saying he \u201cneeded a minute.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u201cThe once-sacrosanct standards of academic rigor at this university have catastrophically declined. I made several trivial blunders while formulating my final essay, and yet I still received an exemplary grade in Power.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2089,"featured_media":6920,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6917","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-komono"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6917","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2089"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6917"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6917\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6919,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6917\/revisions\/6919"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6920"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6917"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6917"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6917"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}