{"id":6679,"date":"2024-10-07T10:17:13","date_gmt":"2024-10-07T15:17:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/?p=6679"},"modified":"2024-10-07T10:17:13","modified_gmt":"2024-10-07T15:17:13","slug":"precocious-first-year-starts-college-with-opps-pre-established","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/2024\/10\/07\/precocious-first-year-starts-college-with-opps-pre-established\/","title":{"rendered":"Precocious First-Year Starts College with Opps Pre-Established"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">JANOTTA HOUSE \u2013 A precocious first-year student has sprinted ahead of the game by establishing random people as enemies before the year has even started. Elizabeth Foggarty has evidently done her research and has even come up with some involved nicknames to tell her friends when her opps walk by. This kind of thinking ahead will surely set her up for even more intricate webs of drama and backstabbing in the next four years!\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Fellow first-years have been impressed by her mature cynicism. \u201cShe just seems so experienced,\u201d said housemate Mary Beth Higgins, who regularly sits next to Foggarty at the house table in Cathey. \u201cShe told me the other day not to talk to Josie because she posts too much on Instagram and it\u2019s annoying, and I feel so validated that she agrees that her hair looks weird!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Halperin resident Georgia Johnson agreed: \u201cElizabeth told me to avoid anyone majoring in Law Letters because she heard that they all have bad vibes\u2014especially her mom\u2019s college friend\u2019s son, who she says is pure evil. I feel so much more prepared already knowing the dangers of Bradley McBradFace (that\u2019s what she calls him)!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Remaining ahead of the curve, Foggarty has also made sure to develop more serious feuds in order to pre-empt any post-O-week enmity. According to an exclusive interview with the <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dealer<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, Foggarty revealed that she refuses to speak to a boy who looked like he would have liked to take her headphones at the silent disco, or to any of his friends. She did not elaborate on this traumatic experience.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We at the <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dealer <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">are impressed by Foggarty\u2019s forward thinking and hope that she will develop many more fruitful enemies in the weeks to come!<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Remaining ahead of the curve, Foggarty has also made sure to develop more serious feuds in order to pre-empt any post-O-week enmity. According to an exclusive interview with the Dealer, Foggarty revealed that she refuses to speak to a boy who looked like he would have liked to take her headphones at the silent disco, or to any of his friends. She did not elaborate on this traumatic experience.\u00a0<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2083,"featured_media":6680,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[13],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6679"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2083"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6679"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6679\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6681,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6679\/revisions\/6681"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6680"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6679"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6679"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6679"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}