{"id":6631,"date":"2024-05-26T03:10:53","date_gmt":"2024-05-26T08:10:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/?p=6631"},"modified":"2024-05-26T03:10:53","modified_gmt":"2024-05-26T08:10:53","slug":"george-washington-founds-america","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/2024\/05\/26\/george-washington-founds-america\/","title":{"rendered":"George Washington Founds America"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">July 4, 1776<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">PHILADELPHIA \u2014 In a major shakeup for the cartography industry, retired general George Washington founded America today.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cAfter a great deal of consideration, months of encouragement from friends and family, and after weighing all the pros and cons, I have decided it\u2019s time to create the United States of America,\u201d Washington told an ebullient crowd at the ribbon-cutting ceremony. \u201cAt long last, there will be a country to fill the gap between Canada and Mexico.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Most of those in attendance praised Washington&#8217;s decision. \u201cIt\u2019s about damn time there was a country here,\u201d said Francis G. Applebench, a 67-year-old bloodletter from Stockbridge, Massachusetts. \u201cI\u2019ve had about all I can take of living in a politically ambiguous geographical area.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Others were less enthusiastic. \u201cI know a lot of people were clamoring to have a country here, but I don\u2019t know how exactly to feel about the whole thing,\u201d said Henry C. Twigberry of Charleston, South Carolina, who said he worked in human resources. \u201cPersonally, I was hoping he might found Belgium or Uruguay or something.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Reached for comment, King George III of Great Britain and Ireland, who waged an eight-year war to stop George Washington from founding America, said simply, \u201cWhatever, man.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Washington said his next step would be to start writing a new constitution for America. \u201cI\u2019ve got a lot of ideas, and I can\u2019t wait to sink someone else\u2019s teeth into it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In order to raise money for the new country, Washington said he would hold a nationwide raffle, with prizes including the western half of Connecticut, the chance to write an amendment to the constitution, and a picture of a horse drawn by Benjamin Franklin, a prominent kite enthusiast in the Philadelphia area.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u201cAfter a great deal of consideration, months of encouragement from friends and family, and after weighing all the pros and cons, I have decided it\u2019s time to create the United States of America,\u201d Washington told an ebullient crowd at the ribbon-cutting ceremony. \u201cAt long last, there will be a country to fill the gap between Canada and Mexico.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6632,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6631","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-historical-issue"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6631","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6631"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6631\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6633,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6631\/revisions\/6633"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6632"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6631"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6631"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6631"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}