{"id":6588,"date":"2024-04-05T12:42:15","date_gmt":"2024-04-05T17:42:15","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/?p=6588"},"modified":"2024-11-04T23:48:40","modified_gmt":"2024-11-05T05:48:40","slug":"hallowed-grounds-shift-composed-of-2-people-to-stand-there-and-1-person-to-work","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/2024\/04\/05\/hallowed-grounds-shift-composed-of-2-people-to-stand-there-and-1-person-to-work\/","title":{"rendered":"Hallowed Grounds Shift Composed of 2 People to Stand There and 1 Person to Work"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">GROUNDS, HALLOWED\u2014The campus cafe is facing controversy over its alleged misuse of funds. A scathing report from the Maroon<\/span> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">recently revealed that 66% of Hallowed Grounds\u2019 finances are dedicated to people that \u201cdon\u2019t do much.\u201d The report, written by six news editors at the <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Maroon<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> (who all happen to be baristas at Ex Libris) found that Hallowed Grounds has a bloated staff and is long overdue for cuts.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Dealer has undertaken a separate, independent investigation into the possible mismanagement. Anonymous testimony informed The Dealer that it took forty-five minutes to order and receive their iced vanilla latte, even though it was 2 PM and there were supposedly three people on shift. Another Hallowed Grounds customer did not receive their order at all, and spent 2 hours listening to Daft Punk\u2019s <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Discovery<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> on loop<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When pressed about why it took so long, a Hallowed spokesperson stressed the important pool game two members of the team were engaged in, leaving only one employee to stand behind the counter and aggressively flirt with a girl in his SOSC. The employee explained, \u201cI didn\u2019t even know that the metal thing made coffee. I just stand around and ghost women on Hinge.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A scathing report from the Maroon recently revealed that 66% of Hallowed Grounds\u2019 finances are dedicated to people that \u201cdon\u2019t do much.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2081,"featured_media":6590,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6588","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-komono"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6588","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2081"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6588"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6588\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6591,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6588\/revisions\/6591"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6590"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6588"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6588"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6588"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}