{"id":6494,"date":"2024-02-07T15:27:09","date_gmt":"2024-02-07T21:27:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/?p=6494"},"modified":"2024-02-07T15:27:09","modified_gmt":"2024-02-07T21:27:09","slug":"midwave-radio-devastated-at-a-somehow-negative-listener-count","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/2024\/02\/07\/midwave-radio-devastated-at-a-somehow-negative-listener-count\/","title":{"rendered":"Midwave Radio Devastated at a Somehow Negative Listener Count"},"content":{"rendered":"

Members of Midwave Radio, UChicago\u2019s foremost <\/span>online<\/span><\/i> radio broadcast club, were shocked this week when their analytics reported a seemingly impossible fact. According to Midwave\u2019s online listener count, less than 4 people were listening to the programming.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt doesn\u2019t make any sense at all,\u201d said Midwave station director Katherine Perth, \u201cThere\u2019s no glitch in our analytics software. Somehow, in real life, the opposite of 4 people are listening to our shows.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Speculation abounds as to what Midwave\u2019s negative listener count could mean. Some have theorized that certain programs cause listeners to permanently lose their hearing, leading to a negative listener count. Others have argued that the force of the college radio station\u2019s concentrated indie narcissism was great enough to rip a hole in the fabric of reality.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI thought maybe no one was listening to my show, but it now seems like a bunch of people are <\/span>actively not listening <\/span><\/i>to it as well, \u201d said Midwave radio host, Josh Blackburn. Blackburn currently hosts the Midwave interview show <\/span>Are You My Mother?<\/span><\/i>, in each episode of which he calls his girlfriend and demands to know why she doesn\u2019t love him more.<\/span><\/p>\n

In the interest of public safety, the Dealer has drawn up a list of Midwave radio shows which have experienced this phenomenon. The Dealer strongly recommends members of the public refrain from listening to these programs \u2013 not that you were ever going to anyway:<\/span><\/p>\n

Affected programs<\/span><\/p>\n

Big Shirt Small Pants, Small Pants Big Shirt<\/span><\/p>\n

Children of Lawyers<\/span><\/p>\n

Pinochio\u2019s Penis<\/span><\/p>\n

Cigarettes After SOSC<\/span><\/p>\n

Wait, Wait, Why Are You Holding That? The NPR News Quiz<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cIt doesn\u2019t make any sense at all,\u201d said Midwave station director Katherine Perth, \u201cThere\u2019s no glitch in our analytics software. Somehow, in real life, the opposite of 4 people are listening to our shows.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2081,"featured_media":6495,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6494","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-komono"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6494","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2081"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6494"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6494\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6496,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6494\/revisions\/6496"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6495"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6494"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6494"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6494"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}