{"id":6457,"date":"2023-12-05T08:29:34","date_gmt":"2023-12-05T14:29:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/?p=6457"},"modified":"2023-12-03T20:33:55","modified_gmt":"2023-12-04T02:33:55","slug":"helium-balloons-rise-due-to-inflation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/2023\/12\/05\/helium-balloons-rise-due-to-inflation\/","title":{"rendered":"Helium Balloons Rise Due to Inflation"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">CHICAGO \u2014 Children and academics alike were puzzled to find Thursday that helium balloons seemed to be rising at an alarming rate. While this spike will clearly affect parties, corporate events, and balloon arches, it is hard to imagine the consequences for everyday Americans.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">To investigate this phenomenon, the<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Dealer<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> attempted to reach members of the University of Chicago\u2019s Chemistry Department. Unfortunately, our correspondent fell into an eternal slumber under the fluorescent lights in Kent\u2019s basement, so we were forced to consult the Economics Department instead. We found Trevor B. Johnson, a PhD student in economics who happened to be in Cobb, and asked what Americans should do if their balloons were floating out of reach.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cBalloons? Is that like a new cryptocurrency or something? Well, if the prices of assets are rising, that\u2019s a sign of inflation,\u201d said Johnson.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We don\u2019t know which \u201cprices\u201d he was referring to, but we recognize that inflation is indeed an Economics Thing. In conclusion, balloons are rising due to inflation. The University\u2019s Department of Economics is currently investigating why.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>To investigate this phenomenon, the Dealer attempted to reach members of the University of Chicago\u2019s Chemistry Department. Unfortunately, our correspondent fell into an eternal slumber under the fluorescent lights in Kent\u2019s basement, so we were forced to consult the Economics Department instead. We found Trevor B. Johnson, a PhD student in economics who happened to be in Cobb, and asked what Americans should do if their balloons were floating out of reach.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2080,"featured_media":6460,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[17],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6457","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-world-affairs"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6457","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2080"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6457"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6457\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6459,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6457\/revisions\/6459"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6460"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6457"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6457"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6457"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}