Model UN<\/b><\/p>\n
Your parent\u2019s know you did this in high school, but they always thought you did it just to get into college. They will be pleased to hear when you inevitably quit in two weeks. At least you got a hat, a shirt, a blanket, a briefcase, and an engraved dolphin out of it.<\/span><\/p>\n Occam\u2019s Razor\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n You told your parents this was the philosophy club.<\/span><\/p>\n Night Owls<\/b><\/p>\n You told your parents this was the comedy club.<\/span><\/p>\n Life of the Mic<\/b>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n You told your parents this was a lecture series.<\/span><\/p>\n Commedia<\/b><\/p>\n You can\u2019t even explain this to your friends, let alone a 55 year old woman from Connecticut. She sees the masks and thinks you\u2019re the Babadook.<\/span><\/p>\n Kappa Theta Pi<\/b><\/p>\n You told your parents you joined a frat, and they laughed. You go to your room and open up LeetCode. You\u2019ll show them.<\/span><\/p>\n Cricket\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n Both you and your parents were disappointed this wasn\u2019t about bugs.<\/span><\/p>\n Nexus K-Pop Dance Troupe<\/b><\/p>\n Have you seen their feed? They are the Leonardo da Vinci of Canva. They\u2019ll smile solemnly knowing that when you put \u201cproficient in adobe suits\u201d on your resume, you fucking mean it.<\/span><\/p>\n Midwave<\/b><\/p>\n This will break their heart when you tell them their poser kid couldn\u2019t even get on the real college radio station. \u201cInternet radio,\u201d their ass. You\u2019ll see the live listener count of 0 and realize that even your parents won\u2019t listen to your weekly show on Mondays at 4am CST.<\/span><\/p>\n The Blue Chips\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n You proudly tell your parents about how you spent the first month of your independent adult life groveling for a seat in an investment club. You try to tell them that if they had invested $100 in TBC in 2003 they would be looking at a solid $100.20 now. Your father launches into a tangent about a friend of his who got addicted to gambling after joining a poker club in college and sold his kidney. You don\u2019t see the connection.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Dean\u2019s Men\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n You\u2019re not sure whether the cocaine history will raise or lower the Deans Men in your parents\u2019 estimation.<\/span><\/p>\n Folklore Society<\/b><\/p>\n They rejected Bob Dylan but they may accept you.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Firebird Magazine<\/b><\/p>\n You will join this club for a month, and the only thing you will get out of it is a situationship with a Radiohead fan and a UTI.<\/span><\/p>\n Bite Magazine<\/b>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n They thought this meant you would be an Orthodontist. However, it seems like you\u2019ve just committed yourself to being a marketing manager throughout your mid- to late 20s.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Tennis <\/b>We get it, you aren\u2019t good enough for varsity. What do you mean you didn\u2019t get on the club team either? What do you mean you just go to recreational practices?<\/span><\/p>\n Pickleball\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n Your parents aren\u2019t going to hide the fact that they don\u2019t have a goddamn clue what pickleball is, and reassuring them that it must be a real sport if the Wikipedia article was translated into 17 languages isn\u2019t going to help much. Obviously there\u2019s nothing wrong with pursuing your passions, they\u2019ll tell you, but it\u2019s just that your brother plays football for Ohio State and do you really want to spend Thanksgiving dinner explaining to Grandpa Bill how this isn\u2019t the same as badminton? In 5 years, they will tell you about a cool new game they learned from the neighbors. Spoiler: it\u2019s pickleball.<\/span><\/p>\n UC Republicans<\/b><\/p>\n Your parents may not approve of your political activities, but you\u2019ll be having the last laugh when President Vivek Ramaswamy saves America.<\/span><\/p>\n Chicago Shady Dealer<\/b><\/p>\n In spite of your best efforts, your little brother tells his friends you\u2019re a big time drug dealer. It\u2019s fine. They don\u2019t need to know the first time you took an edible you listened to a Vampire Weekend album and cried reading the Wikipedia page for Jimmy Buffet.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Kappa Theta Pi<\/p>\n You told your parents you joined a frat, and they laughed. You go to your room and open up LeetCode. You\u2019ll show them.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6368,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[13],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6366","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-campus-life"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6366","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6366"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6366\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6371,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6366\/revisions\/6371"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6368"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6366"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6366"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6366"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}