{"id":4340,"date":"2020-10-06T11:49:57","date_gmt":"2020-10-06T04:49:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/?p=4340"},"modified":"2020-10-05T22:00:45","modified_gmt":"2020-10-05T15:00:45","slug":"kids-that-would-have-gone-wild-in-college-still-trying-to-go-wild-over-quarantine","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/2020\/10\/06\/kids-that-would-have-gone-wild-in-college-still-trying-to-go-wild-over-quarantine\/","title":{"rendered":"Kids That Would Have Gone Wild in College Still Trying to Go Wild Over Quarantine"},"content":{"rendered":"

The University of Chicago has opted to allow students the option of distance learning for the Autumn 2020 quarter, stranding many students with overprotective parents and giving students a desperate and immediate need to rebel against all their jerkface parents\u2019 stupid rules. Unfortunately, according to a recent poll, 100% of students who would have gone wild in college due to their restrictive parents are now stuck at home, also due to their restrictive parents. Necessity is the mother of invention, however, and some students have started getting creative.<\/span><\/p>\n

Many have applied tips and tricks acquired while distance-learning to having fun. \u201cI like to have a party space\u201d says incoming distance-learning first-year Allison Bartlett. \u201cIf the pandemic has taught me anything, it\u2019s that separating the different parts of my life is very important. Just like I shouldn\u2019t be working in the same place I\u2019m sleeping, I shouldn\u2019t be working in the same place I\u2019m aggressively seducing the high-quality cardboard cutout of Robert De Niro I keep hidden in my bedroom closet.\u201d Bartlett went on to note that she\u2019s \u201cdoing all the alcohol,\u201d and \u201cdon\u2019t drop til the party train stops, woot woot.\u201d This reporter would also like to note that the cutout of Robert De Niro was 2020-70-year-old Robert De Niro, but Bartlett seemed to be having fun.<\/span><\/p>\n

The trend of first-years going wild over quarantine hasn\u2019t gone unnoticed by their parents, however.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019re worried,\u201d says Katherine Perillo, on behalf of herself and her husband, whose son will be a student in the College this fall. \u201cJeremy told us he wanted to set more boundaries this year, so we set up his room as his \u2018college space.\u2019 Ok, that\u2019s fine, we\u2019ll give him his space. But occasionally he\u2019ll tell us he\u2019s studying, and we can clearly hear the loud bumping baselines of rapper Flo Rida\u2019s hit single \u2018My House.\u2019 But then he\u2019ll walk out of his room and act like everything\u2019s normal.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

While\u00a0 students with helicopter parents typically mellow out after their wild phase, it is unclear what will happen to these quarantine students. But for now, they\u2019re having the time of their lives.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The University of Chicago has opted to allow students the option of distance learning for the Autumn 2020 quarter, stranding many students with overprotective parents and giving students a desperate and immediate need to rebel against all their jerkface parents\u2019 stupid rules. Unfortunately, according to a recent poll, 100% of students who would have gone wild in college due to their restrictive parents are now stuck at home, also due to their restrictive parents. Necessity is the mother of invention, however, and some students have started getting creative. Many have applied tips and tricks acquired while distance-learning to having fun. \u201cI like to have a party space\u201d says incoming distance-learning first-year Allison Bartlett. \u201cIf the pandemic has taught me anything, it\u2019s that separating the different parts of my life is very important. Just like I shouldn\u2019t be working in the same place I\u2019m sleeping, I shouldn\u2019t be working in the same place I\u2019m aggressively seducing the high-quality cardboard cutout of Robert De Niro I keep hidden in my bedroom closet.\u201d Bartlett went on to note that she\u2019s \u201cdoing all the alcohol,\u201d and \u201cdon\u2019t drop til the party train stops, woot woot.\u201d This reporter would also like to note that the cutout of Robert De Niro was 2020-70-year-old Robert De Niro, but Bartlett seemed to be having fun. The trend of first-years going wild over quarantine hasn\u2019t gone unnoticed by their parents, however. \u201cWe\u2019re worried,\u201d says Katherine Perillo, on behalf of herself and her husband, whose son will be a student in the College this fall. \u201cJeremy told us he wanted to set more boundaries this year, so we set up his room as his \u2018college space.\u2019 Ok, that\u2019s fine, we\u2019ll give him his space. But occasionally he\u2019ll tell us he\u2019s studying, and we can clearly hear the loud bumping baselines of rapper Flo Rida\u2019s hit single \u2018My House.\u2019 But then he\u2019ll walk out of his room and act like everything\u2019s normal.\u201d While\u00a0 students with helicopter parents typically mellow out after their wild phase, it is unclear what will happen to these quarantine students. But for now, they\u2019re having the time of their lives.  <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":254,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4340","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-komono"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4340","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/254"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4340"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4340\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4340"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4340"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4340"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}