{"id":3739,"date":"2020-01-17T03:56:26","date_gmt":"2020-01-16T20:56:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/?p=3739"},"modified":"2022-07-25T11:03:02","modified_gmt":"2022-07-25T16:03:02","slug":"lonely-first-year-desperate-for-pet-grows-mold","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/2020\/01\/17\/lonely-first-year-desperate-for-pet-grows-mold\/","title":{"rendered":"Lonely First Year, Desperate for Pet, Grows Mold"},"content":{"rendered":"

Everyone should know by this point in the year that the only pets allowed in dorms are the RH\u2019s dogs and kids. Kevin Garcia, however, discovered the loophole of all loopholes. He spilled some soda on a sourdough roll from McCathy in the corner of his single, set the thermostat to a cool 68 degrees Fahrenheit and let nature take its course. After about a week, he had a new, spotty green friend. When asked why he chose to grow this unconventional companion in particular, he said, \u201cI was deciding between a chia pet and moldy bread but ultimately decided on the bread because its unique shape gives it personality \u2014 as opposed to chia pets, which are all manufactured to be exactly the same. I also liked the idea of it being all natural without any preservatives, and the low cost was a bonus as well.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

When asked why he didn\u2019t just get a plant like one of the succulents from the RSO fair or the pumpkins from Wellapalooza. Kevin said, \u201cI wanted to be different and unique, you know, one of my goals for the year was to be less vanilla\u201d. This reporter thinks that he went to the wrong school for that. Nevertheless, further investigations revealed that Kevin didn\u2019t go to either event because he didn\u2019t have any friends to go with him. However, he says that he is no longer lonely now that he finally has a friend to play Smash Bros with.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Everyone should know by this point in the year that the only pets allowed in dorms are the RH\u2019s dogs and kids. Kevin Garcia, however, discovered the loophole of all loopholes. He spilled some soda on a sourdough roll from McCathy in the corner of his single, set the thermostat to a cool 68 degrees Fahrenheit and let nature take its course. After about a week, he had a new, spotty green friend. When asked why he chose to grow this unconventional companion in particular, he said, \u201cI was deciding between a chia pet and moldy bread but ultimately decided on the bread because its unique shape gives it personality \u2014 as opposed to chia pets, which are all manufactured to be exactly the same. I also liked the idea of it being all natural without any preservatives, and the low cost was a bonus as well.\u201d When asked why he didn\u2019t just get a plant like one of the succulents from the RSO fair or the pumpkins from Wellapalooza. Kevin said, \u201cI wanted to be different and unique, you know, one of my goals for the year was to be less vanilla\u201d. This reporter thinks that he went to the wrong school for that. Nevertheless, further investigations revealed that Kevin didn\u2019t go to either event because he didn\u2019t have any friends to go with him. However, he says that he is no longer lonely now that he finally has a friend to play Smash Bros with.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":254,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3739"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/254"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3739"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3739\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5471,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3739\/revisions\/5471"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3739"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3739"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3739"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}