{"id":1768,"date":"2013-03-16T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2013-03-15T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/35.224.237.165\/index.php\/2019\/02\/25\/overconfident-first-year-takes-all-of-floors-condoms\/"},"modified":"2019-02-26T04:58:28","modified_gmt":"2019-02-25T21:58:28","slug":"overconfident-first-year-takes-all-of-floors-condoms","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/2013\/03\/16\/overconfident-first-year-takes-all-of-floors-condoms\/","title":{"rendered":"Overconfident First Year Takes All of Floor&#8217;s Condoms"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"\" alt=\" \" \/><\/p>\n<h6>By <a href=\"\/search?author=Ashton Hashemipour\">Ashton Hashemipour<\/a><\/h6>\n<h6>Oct. 11, 2016<\/h6>\n<p><insert class=\"ins cts-1\" data-cid=\"2\" data-time=\"1476197834541\" data-userid=\"23\" data-username=\"Jacob Levin\">Quietly scurrying out of the communal bathroom, first-year Carl Smith was seen making his way towards his double roo<insert class=\"ins cts-2\" data-cid=\"20\" data-time=\"1476753663940\" data-userid=\"27\" data-username=\"Jacob Johnson\">m<\/insert><delete class=\"del cts-2\" data-cid=\"19\" data-time=\"1476753660504\" data-userid=\"27\" data-username=\"Jacob Johnson\">m<\/delete><delete class=\"del cts-2\" data-cid=\"15\" data-time=\"1476753649613\" data-userid=\"27\" data-username=\"Jacob Johnson\">, <\/delete><\/insert><insert class=\"ins cts-1\" data-cid=\"2\" data-time=\"1476197834541\" data-userid=\"23\" data-username=\"Jacob Levin\"><delete class=\"del cts-2\" data-cid=\"13\" data-time=\"1476753645903\" data-userid=\"27\" data-username=\"Jacob Johnson\">his <\/delete>pockets filled to the brim with condoms. \u201cLook,\u201d the 5\u20194\u201d computer science major beg<insert class=\"ins cts-2\" data-cid=\"4\" data-time=\"1476753427640\" data-userid=\"27\" data-username=\"Jacob Johnson\">an<\/insert><delete class=\"del cts-2\" data-cid=\"3\" data-time=\"1476753427635\" data-userid=\"27\" data-username=\"Jacob Johnson\">ins<\/delete>, \u201cI\u2019m not expecting to use all of these in a week, but the fact of the matter is that I\u2019m always looking to fuck, and the ladies need to know.\u201d The 18-year-old virgin, whose dick has never been touched by anything other than his own hand, is confident that he\u2019ll have a harem by the end of the first quarter. <insert class=\"ins cts-2\" data-cid=\"7\" data-time=\"1476753447203\" data-userid=\"27\" data-username=\"Jacob Johnson\"><\/insert><\/insert><\/p>\n<p><insert class=\"ins cts-1\" data-cid=\"2\" data-time=\"1476197834541\" data-userid=\"23\" data-username=\"Jacob Levin\"><insert class=\"ins cts-2\" data-cid=\"7\" data-time=\"1476753447203\" data-userid=\"27\" data-username=\"Jacob Johnson\">Smith<\/insert><delete class=\"del cts-2\" data-cid=\"6\" data-time=\"1476753447197\" data-userid=\"27\" data-username=\"Jacob Johnson\">Johnson <\/delete>was last seen<delete class=\"del cts-2\" data-cid=\"12\" data-time=\"1476753456757\" data-userid=\"27\" data-username=\"Jacob Johnson\">,<\/delete> by his roommate, trying on a condom, attempting to ensure that there would be no surprises during his future sexual endeavors. <\/insert><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>By Ashton Hashemipour Oct. 11, 2016 Quietly scurrying out of the communal bathroom, first-year Carl Smith was seen making his way towards his double roomm, his pockets filled to the brim with condoms. \u201cLook,\u201d the 5\u20194\u201d computer science major beganins, \u201cI\u2019m not expecting to use all of these in a week, but the fact of the matter is that I\u2019m always looking to fuck, and the ladies need to know.\u201d The 18-year-old virgin, whose dick has never been touched by anything other than his own hand, is confident that he\u2019ll have a harem by the end of the first quarter. SmithJohnson was last seen, by his roommate, trying on a condom, attempting to ensure that there would be no surprises during his future sexual endeavors.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1768","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-komono"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1768","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1768"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1768\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2801,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1768\/revisions\/2801"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1768"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1768"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1768"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}