{"id":1767,"date":"2013-03-16T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2013-03-15T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/35.224.237.165\/index.php\/2019\/02\/25\/how-to-make-your-couples-costume-work-post-breakup\/"},"modified":"2019-02-26T04:58:28","modified_gmt":"2019-02-25T21:58:28","slug":"how-to-make-your-couples-costume-work-post-breakup","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/2013\/03\/16\/how-to-make-your-couples-costume-work-post-breakup\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Make Your Couple’s Costume Work Post-Breakup"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"<\/p>\n

By Adam Lowinger<\/a><\/h6>\n
Oct. 11, 2016<\/h6>\n

Does the following apply to you? You\u2019ve just had a tragic breakup with the person you thought would be the one, and now you\u2019re stuck with your half of the planned couple\u2019s costume. You have no time to return and buy\/make something new. Worry not dear friend, because the Shady Dealer <\/em>has some quick tips to at least salvage the costume since, let\u2019s face it, the relationship is over.<\/insert><\/p>\n

1. Fake blood the shit out of that costume<\/strong>: So you lost the Rea<\/insert>gan to your Nancy costume<\/delete>, but fake blood is pretty cheap and\/or easy to make. Just pour <\/insert>a little of that stuff,<\/insert> rough up the clothes<\/insert>in conjunction with a bit of tattering o<\/delete>f the clothes<\/delete> and you have zombie or \u201cfinally snapped and killed that bastard\u201d Nancy Rea<\/insert>gan. They deserve it for leaving you.<\/insert><\/p>\n

<\/insert><\/p>\n

2. Inanimate objects still work as a stand-alone<\/strong>: If the plan was to be something non-human<\/insert>be a pair of non-human costumes<\/delete>, you can still dress<\/insert> still are dressed<\/delete> up without them. Being a single jar of Peanut Butter is no reason to be jelly of all the couples that are having fun around you. This is especially useful if you were the salt to their pepper, as you will have an easy time staying in character.<\/insert><\/p>\n

<\/insert><\/p>\n

3. Less is more<\/strong>: Cut as much of that costume as you can because no one is going to judge the length of your attire on Halloween. Make sure you to keep your \u201cedits\u201d in sight of your ex at all times in order to remind them that they chose to miss out on all this.<\/insert><\/p>\n

<\/insert><\/p>\n

4. Just don\u2019t talk about it<\/strong>: If anyone comes up to you and ask where your other half is, immediately change the subject. Should they persist, drop your drink on them immediately<\/delete>. As you go to get a napkin, leave the party. Repeat his process as<\/insert>\ufeff<\/insert><\/delete>as<\/delete>\ufeff<\/insert><\/delete> needed throughout the night. <\/insert><\/p>\n

<\/insert><\/p>\n

5. Acceptance<\/strong>: You can just embrace the idea that the smile you maintain at the party is nothing more than a fa\u00e7ade to hide your inner, un-ending misery; therefore, it is already a perfect costume. <\/insert><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Adam Lowinger Oct. 11, 2016 Does the following apply to you? You\u2019ve just had a tragic breakup with the person you thought would be the one, and now you\u2019re stuck with your half of the planned couple\u2019s costume. You have no time to return and buy\/make something new. Worry not dear friend, because the Shady Dealer has some quick tips to at least salvage the costume since, let\u2019s face it, the relationship is over. 1. Fake blood the shit out of that costume: So you lost the Reagan to your Nancy costume, but fake blood is pretty cheap and\/or easy to make. Just pour a little of that stuff, rough up the clothesin conjunction with a bit of tattering of the clothes and you have zombie or \u201cfinally snapped and killed that bastard\u201d Nancy Reagan. They deserve it for leaving you. 2. Inanimate objects still work as a stand-alone: If the plan was to be something non-humanbe a pair of non-human costumes, you can still dress still are dressed up without them. Being a single jar of Peanut Butter is no reason to be jelly of all the couples that are having fun around you. This is especially useful if you were the salt to their pepper, as you will have an easy time staying in character. 3. Less is more: Cut as much of that costume as you can because no one is going to judge the length of your attire on Halloween. Make sure you to keep your \u201cedits\u201d in sight of your ex at all times in order to remind them that they chose to miss out on all this. 4. Just don\u2019t talk about it: If anyone comes up to you and ask where your other half is, immediately change the subject. Should they persist, drop your drink on them immediately. As you go to get a napkin, leave the party. Repeat his process as\ufeffas\ufeff needed throughout the night. 5. Acceptance: You can just embrace the idea that the smile you maintain at the party is nothing more than a fa\u00e7ade to hide your inner, un-ending misery; therefore, it is already a perfect costume.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1767","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-komono"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1767","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1767"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1767\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2800,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1767\/revisions\/2800"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1767"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1767"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1767"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}