{"id":1760,"date":"2013-03-16T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2013-03-15T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/35.224.237.165\/index.php\/2019\/02\/25\/first-year-struggles-to-hide-stolen-condoms-before-family-weekend\/"},"modified":"2019-02-26T04:58:27","modified_gmt":"2019-02-25T21:58:27","slug":"first-year-struggles-to-hide-stolen-condoms-before-family-weekend","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/2013\/03\/16\/first-year-struggles-to-hide-stolen-condoms-before-family-weekend\/","title":{"rendered":"First Year Struggles to Hide Stolen Condoms Before Family Weekend"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"<\/p>\n

By Marlin Figgins<\/a><\/h6>\n
Oct. 12, 2016<\/h6>\n

First <\/insert>–<\/delete>year Jameson A. Delaney, who requested to be called by his stage name <\/insert>\u201cJay D- Lane\u201d, is now releasing his first single, which is based on an experience during Family Weekend. When asked about this experience, Jay D-Lane would only respond in mumbles that I, the interviewing reporter, deciphered as the following:<\/insert><\/p>\n

<\/insert><\/p>\n

\u201cYou know,<\/insert> I\u2019m just doing this to rep the streets where I come from\u201d, stated Jay D-Lane. \u201cB\u2019s be playing and sometimes you got to set them straight.\u201d<\/insert><\/p>\n

<\/insert><\/p>\n

After being asked where exactly did he <\/delete>he<\/insert> came <\/insert>ome<\/delete> from and how did this song <\/delete>this song <\/insert>\u201crepped<\/insert>\u201d his hometown, Jay D-Lane responded, \u201cI thought we were here to talk about the music.<\/insert>;<\/delete> T<\/insert>t<\/delete>his is getting too personal, d<\/delete>D<\/insert>awg.\u201d<\/insert><\/p>\n

He began to tell the story of O-Week,<\/insert> during which <\/insert>when<\/delete> he “borrowed” <\/insert>took<\/delete> a<\/delete> 23 condoms from the Wallace h<\/delete>H<\/insert>ouse l<\/delete>L<\/insert>ounge,<\/delete> because he was going to be drowning in <\/insert>what he called \u201cthat Kitty Patty Wack\u201d.<\/insert>, <\/delete>but p<\/delete> <\/insert>P<\/insert>roblems began to arise when he discovered that \u201cKitty Patty Wack\u201d was harder to come by than first imagined. Soon<\/delete> b<\/delete>B<\/insert>y second week, he realized that he used exactly zero<\/insert>0 <\/delete>0<\/delete><\/insert> of his <\/delete>the borrowed<\/insert> condoms, which still <\/insert>lay in a pile on his desk next to his bottle of <\/insert> lube, also unused. <\/insert><\/p>\n

<\/insert><\/p>\n

Jay D-Lane continued his story, saying <\/insert>s<\/delete>aying<\/delete> that the real dilemma began when he received a phone call from Dr. Timothy A. Delaney, Ph.D, and Dr. Jane C. Delaney, MD. The Delaney family had called to inform their son that they would be coming to visit him <\/insert>their son<\/delete> for Family Weekend.<\/insert><\/p>\n

<\/insert><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, this is where the song comes in.<\/insert>,<\/delete> I\u2019m rapping about getting rid of the condoms. Can\u2019t have my momma know I\u2019m doing the dirt out here, ya know? I start the song off with\u2026 Actually, you want me to perform it for you?\u201d, asked <\/insert>stated<\/delete> Jay.<\/insert><\/p>\n

<\/insert><\/p>\n

Despite my numerous refusals to hear the song, Jay went on:<\/insert><\/p>\n

<\/insert><\/p>\n

\u201cOne, two,<\/insert> I hid them in my shoe. What else can I do? Three, f<\/insert>F<\/delete>our, hid \u2018em up under my door. You can\u2019t find them no more\u2026 Five, s<\/insert>S<\/delete>ix, I put them on my\u2026\u201d, rapped Jay D-Lane. These rhymes, which he claims were inspired by The Cat in the Hat, continued for another hour. <\/insert><\/p>\n

<\/insert><\/p>\n

After finishing up his rap, Jay revealed that he did not succeed in hiding all the condoms because he left one on the <\/insert>dresser, just in case. This condom was later discovered<\/insert> by his mother Jane<\/delete>, who then proceeded to ignore its existence.<\/insert><\/p>\n

<\/insert><\/p>\n

Jay\u2019s rhymes led to a very interesting interview, one unlike any other. His song \u201cHide That Silly Willy\u201d will be released the Tuesday of 6th week on his Sound<\/insert>c<\/insert>d<\/delete> <\/delete>C<\/delete>loud.<\/insert>,<\/delete> B<\/insert>b<\/delete>e sure to pretend that you listened to it.<\/insert><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Marlin Figgins Oct. 12, 2016 First –year Jameson A. Delaney, who requested to be called by his stage name \u201cJay D- Lane\u201d, is now releasing his first single, which is based on an experience during Family Weekend. When asked about this experience, Jay D-Lane would only respond in mumbles that I, the interviewing reporter, deciphered as the following: \u201cYou know, I\u2019m just doing this to rep the streets where I come from\u201d, stated Jay D-Lane. \u201cB\u2019s be playing and sometimes you got to set them straight.\u201d After being asked where exactly did he he came ome from and how did this song this song \u201crepped\u201d his hometown, Jay D-Lane responded, \u201cI thought we were here to talk about the music.; Tthis is getting too personal, dDawg.\u201d He began to tell the story of O-Week, during which when he “borrowed” took a 23 condoms from the Wallace hHouse lLounge, because he was going to be drowning in what he called \u201cthat Kitty Patty Wack\u201d., but p Problems began to arise when he discovered that \u201cKitty Patty Wack\u201d was harder to come by than first imagined. Soon bBy second week, he realized that he used exactly zero0 0 of his the borrowed condoms, which still lay in a pile on his desk next to his bottle of lube, also unused. Jay D-Lane continued his story, saying saying that the real dilemma began when he received a phone call from Dr. Timothy A. Delaney, Ph.D, and Dr. Jane C. Delaney, MD. The Delaney family had called to inform their son that they would be coming to visit him their son for Family Weekend. \u201cYeah, this is where the song comes in., I\u2019m rapping about getting rid of the condoms. Can\u2019t have my momma know I\u2019m doing the dirt out here, ya know? I start the song off with\u2026 Actually, you want me to perform it for you?\u201d, asked stated Jay. Despite my numerous refusals to hear the song, Jay went on: \u201cOne, two, I hid them in my shoe. What else can I do? Three, fFour, hid \u2018em up under my door. You can\u2019t find them no more\u2026 Five, sSix, I put them on my\u2026\u201d, rapped Jay D-Lane. These rhymes, which he claims were inspired by The Cat in the Hat, continued for another hour. After finishing up his rap, Jay revealed that he did not succeed in hiding all the condoms because he left one on the dresser, just in case. This condom was later discovered by his mother Jane, who then proceeded to ignore its existence. Jay\u2019s rhymes led to a very interesting interview, one unlike any other. His song \u201cHide That Silly Willy\u201d will be released the Tuesday of 6th week on his Soundcd Cloud., Bbe sure to pretend that you listened to it.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1760"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1760"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1760\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2793,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1760\/revisions\/2793"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1760"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1760"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1760"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}