{"id":1759,"date":"2013-03-16T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2013-03-15T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/35.224.237.165\/index.php\/2019\/02\/25\/four-things-to-do-when-youre-sexiled\/"},"modified":"2019-02-26T04:58:27","modified_gmt":"2019-02-25T21:58:27","slug":"four-things-to-do-when-youre-sexiled","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/2013\/03\/16\/four-things-to-do-when-youre-sexiled\/","title":{"rendered":"Four Things to Do When You’re Sexiled"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"<\/p>\n

By Sue Donim<\/a><\/h6>\n
Oct. 13, 2016<\/h6>\n

<\/insert>We\u2019ve all been there. You‘re<\/insert> are<\/delete> making your way back to your dorm after a long night of studying,<\/insert> only to find a sock has been <\/delete>sloppily cast upon your doorknob. You\u2019ve just been sexiled. But what can you do to pass the time until your roommate finally busts a fat nutty buddy on that ass?<\/insert> ? <\/delete>The The Th <\/delete>The Chicago<\/i><\/insert> Shady Dealer <\/i>has compiled a list of our favorite things to do while your roommate empties the pipes.<\/p>\n

1. <\/insert>Cheer them on<\/p>\n

(<\/delete>This tried-and-true method never fails?) <\/delete><\/insert>This method is <\/delete>proven effective<\/delete>!<\/insert>.<\/delete> It is the quickest way to get back into your room. In order to further stimulate your roommate, you need to encourage their sexual promiscuity with a little cheer. This will get them to climax and you into your bed faster. A personal<\/insert> favorite cheer of mine<\/delete> is: \u201cfuck \u2018em, suck \u2018em, please go down, jerk it, twerk it, cum \u2018til you drown!\u201d<\/p>\n

2. <\/insert>Sexile everyone from the lounge<\/p>\n

The best way to bring attention to your issue is to get other people involved. If you\u2019re getting<\/delete> sexiled, go into the lounge and masturbate. Remember: it\u2019s sex even when it\u2019s with yourself! Chances are people will start paying attention to you and take you seriously!<\/p>\n

3. <\/insert>Sample their climax and use it to create a hit song<\/p>\n

What better way to get revenge than to use your roommate\u2019s soft grunting as the sample to this year\u2019s next biggest hit? Not only will you become rich and famous, but they won\u2019t be able to escape the constant reminders of their sexual escapade!<\/p>\n

4. <\/insert>Install a glory hole<\/p>\n

Why should your roommate get laid while you wait? Take the waiting out of it! Install a gloryhole either in your door or in <\/insert>your neighbor\u2019s wall,<\/insert> so you can get some action without your roommate ever knowing! Genius!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Sue Donim Oct. 13, 2016 We\u2019ve all been there. You‘re are making your way back to your dorm after a long night of studying, only to find a sock has been sloppily cast upon your doorknob. You\u2019ve just been sexiled. But what can you do to pass the time until your roommate finally busts a fat nutty buddy on that ass? ? The The Th The Chicago Shady Dealer has compiled a list of our favorite things to do while your roommate empties the pipes. 1. Cheer them on (This tried-and-true method never fails?) This method is proven effective!. It is the quickest way to get back into your room. In order to further stimulate your roommate, you need to encourage their sexual promiscuity with a little cheer. This will get them to climax and you into your bed faster. A personal favorite cheer of mine is: \u201cfuck \u2018em, suck \u2018em, please go down, jerk it, twerk it, cum \u2018til you drown!\u201d 2. Sexile everyone from the lounge The best way to bring attention to your issue is to get other people involved. If you\u2019re getting sexiled, go into the lounge and masturbate. Remember: it\u2019s sex even when it\u2019s with yourself! Chances are people will start paying attention to you and take you seriously! 3. Sample their climax and use it to create a hit song What better way to get revenge than to use your roommate\u2019s soft grunting as the sample to this year\u2019s next biggest hit? Not only will you become rich and famous, but they won\u2019t be able to escape the constant reminders of their sexual escapade! 4. Install a glory hole Why should your roommate get laid while you wait? Take the waiting out of it! Install a gloryhole either in your door or in your neighbor\u2019s wall, so you can get some action without your roommate ever knowing! Genius!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1759"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1759"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1759\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2792,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1759\/revisions\/2792"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1759"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1759"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1759"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}