{"id":1603,"date":"2013-03-16T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2013-03-15T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/35.224.237.165\/index.php\/2019\/02\/25\/entire-class-of-2021-named-melvin\/"},"modified":"2019-02-26T04:57:56","modified_gmt":"2019-02-25T21:57:56","slug":"entire-class-of-2021-named-melvin","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/2013\/03\/16\/entire-class-of-2021-named-melvin\/","title":{"rendered":"Entire Class of 2021 Named \u201cMelvin\u201d"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"<\/p>\n

By Jacob Johnson<\/a><\/h6>\n
April 25, 2017<\/h6>\n

Jacob Johnson<\/insert><\/delete> <\/insert><\/delete>Entire Class of 2021 Named \u201cMelvin\u201d<\/insert><\/delete> <\/delete>In an inexplicable turn of events, the University\u2019s Office of Admissions confirmed this Sunday that the entire incoming class of 2021, male and female, is somehow named \u201cMelvin.<\/insert>\u201d.<\/delete> No staff member is certain how this happened,<\/delete> or how no one was able to recognize this fact during the admissions process.<\/insert><\/p>\n

\u201cI mean, it seems like people would be able to tell,\u201d commented admitted student Melvin Marquez. \u201cAlso, just how many people named Melvin are there? Did they just admit every Melvin in the entire world?\u201d <\/insert><\/p>\n

The name Melvin, traditionally used to refer to a male, has not been even the tenth-most-popular name in the entire eighty-nine years name popularity has been recorded in the United States. No one seems to know who these Melvins are, or where they come from.<\/insert><\/p>\n

\u201cLook, there are international students admitted from places like China and India, right?\u201d noted admitted student Melvin \u201cMel\u201d Rivers. \u201cAre you telling me that a bunch of parents in these foreign countries all decided to name their child \u2018<\/delete>Melvin\u2019<\/delete>? That sounds completely insane.\u201d<\/insert><\/p>\n

\u201cIt seems as though<\/insert>like<\/delete> some mistakes were made,”<\/insert>\u201d,<\/delete> said Dean Boyer in a recent press release, \u201cbut rest assured, these Melvins are of the highest academic integrity and have been selected because we know they have the capacity to flourish at this institution.\u201d<\/insert><\/p>\n

\u201cI guess, on the bright side it\u2019ll be easy to remember everyone\u2019s name.\u201d m<\/delete>m<\/insert>used admitted student Melvin \u201cVin\u201d Long. \u201cOn the downside, adding people on Facebook is gonna absolutely suck.“<\/insert> <\/insert><\/p>\n

Student advise<\/delete>o<\/insert>rs point out that this is hardly a new challenge for students at the University, seeing as the entire admitted class of 2020 was named \u201c<\/delete>Sophie\u201d<\/delete>.<\/insert> <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Jacob Johnson April 25, 2017 Jacob Johnson Entire Class of 2021 Named \u201cMelvin\u201d In an inexplicable turn of events, the University\u2019s Office of Admissions confirmed this Sunday that the entire incoming class of 2021, male and female, is somehow named \u201cMelvin.\u201d. No staff member is certain how this happened, or how no one was able to recognize this fact during the admissions process. \u201cI mean, it seems like people would be able to tell,\u201d commented admitted student Melvin Marquez. \u201cAlso, just how many people named Melvin are there? Did they just admit every Melvin in the entire world?\u201d The name Melvin, traditionally used to refer to a male, has not been even the tenth-most-popular name in the entire eighty-nine years name popularity has been recorded in the United States. No one seems to know who these Melvins are, or where they come from. \u201cLook, there are international students admitted from places like China and India, right?\u201d noted admitted student Melvin \u201cMel\u201d Rivers. \u201cAre you telling me that a bunch of parents in these foreign countries all decided to name their child \u2018Melvin\u2019? That sounds completely insane.\u201d \u201cIt seems as thoughlike some mistakes were made,”\u201d, said Dean Boyer in a recent press release, \u201cbut rest assured, these Melvins are of the highest academic integrity and have been selected because we know they have the capacity to flourish at this institution.\u201d \u201cI guess, on the bright side it\u2019ll be easy to remember everyone\u2019s name.\u201d mmused admitted student Melvin \u201cVin\u201d Long. \u201cOn the downside, adding people on Facebook is gonna absolutely suck.“ Student adviseors point out that this is hardly a new challenge for students at the University, seeing as the entire admitted class of 2020 was named \u201cSophie\u201d.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1603","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-komono"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1603","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1603"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1603\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2636,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1603\/revisions\/2636"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1603"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1603"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoshadydealer.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1603"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}